Feminists don't have it easy. There are a few men who state that if you are a feminist you can't behave in a certain way. When I did my research on the institution of marriage in India, I asked people what they felt about extramarital affairs, pre-marital sex and many related questions. I had a few people complaining that feminists refusing sexual exploration are not feminists at all but hypocrites. That came as a surprise. All feminists are not bra burners, nor are they marriage breakers neither do all of them indulge in pre-marital sex. Feminism for heavens sake is all about choice and letting the woman make her choice in life.
Being a feminist, I know I have my negotiations to make. After all I am a part of the society which is patriarchal, ( I oppose it, or agree to it, It doesnt matter). As a feminist, I have had to make my difficult choices, for parents, for family, for my boyfriend, for friends. Its not easy to rebel when you know that eighty percent of people might be branding you, or are looking at you as a misfit. There are doubts and times when one does wonder if the battle of sexes really worth it? or if one is just fighting for the heck of it. Ideals make us fight, but at times one has to give in to the pressures of the society they live in.
A feminist is still a woman, and very much a part of the social system put in place for ages now. She would rebel, but in the end she is still part of a family and does desire to be a daughter, a mother, a wife, a friend and maintain her relationships.
4 comments:
"She would rebel, but in the end she is still part of a family and does desire to be a daughter, a mother, a wife, a friend and maintain her relationships."
That's a bit of a generalization, surely? Not all women (or feminists) want to be wives or mothers, as far as I know.
Thats the whole point I am trying to make. Feminists cant be put under any tags. Feminism is all about choices. I as a feminist ask for my right to do what I want to do and not do what others want me to do. I want to get married and have children thats my choice. Some feminists dont want to do so. My arguement here was against men who state that bcos a woman is a feminist she should be open to exploring her sexuality and shouldnt believe in the institution of marriage, which I find problematic..
To a certain extent you are right soultrot I mean as far as it is concerned to making choices. But dont forget that society is as much a process of evolution as is life. This Darwinian explaination has restricted the choices available to any woman and the issue of feminism rises again and again. You say that you are always in search of harmony. Think about harmonious existence, stop calling yourself feminist. Just demand that much freedom as much is warranted by the Darwinian explaination. Life is a struggle and in case total equality is achieved, in next 100000 years we may turn in to creatures like earth worms. One sex will certainly have to go extinct. Stop calling yourself feminist concentrate on the next generation. The very purpose of the evolution of the female species is regeneration only and not cooking and cleaning houses. And for this very purpose the existing arrangements are not bad at all. Rest of the issues differ from person to person.
@ Karnail: Its my choice to call myself a feminist. Its not only the female who is there for regeneration. without the male how will the new generation come into being?, so both men and women are required for the next generation to be there. that way if darwins theory states that either of the species will die. In case of humans if one of them die then no reproduction is possible. Harmony is all about equality, one has a clash when there is difference.
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