Soultrot

2011-07-31T00:23:00.000+05:00

White canvas
And a painted dream
Of white swans
A beautiful lake
Green grass surrounding

Years passed by
The canvas grew old
Swans turned yellow
Water splashed on the lake
Green turned brown
Wear and tear
And one day
The canvas tore

2011-07-07T01:50:00.002+05:00

As the cool breeze passed me by
A wave of shy smiles, some laughter
affection and love revisited
I sat on a bench
staring at the water
thoughts smiled
Past so beautiful
a present so unbelievable
And then I woke up..

2011-07-07T01:50:00.001+05:00

Tired, eyes wide open

words, sentences,

un deciphered,

heard yet un heard,

food gobbled,

...Taste unknown,

music played

not listened,

tick tock, alarm

rush rush, go

rush rush, return

tick tock tick tock tick

2011-07-07T01:49:00.002+05:00

Eyes refused to see the other

Good bye halted at the throat

Heart beats awaited a voice

But silence spoke

Bodies moved away

And the memory remained

2011-07-07T01:49:00.001+05:00

calm, sound of silence

battleground of thoughts

Uncertainity lingers

Empty and drained

Hope is a wonderful word.

2011-07-06T00:03:00.002+05:00

Back after a year, 3 months and 3 days. Spent a night reading through all the old posts. Wonder where that girl disappeared. Wow!! I wrote quite some stupid things on this blog, and surprisingly people did read then :D.

I have been a bit rusty when it comes to writing. Words which flowed easily 3 years ago, suddenly don't seem to flow anymore and I am more to blame for it cos I let myself be rusty and lazy. I guess its a good time to start writing and sharing.

In a few months I complete 30 years of existence on this planet. 3 decades and a lot of memories. I can classify each decade into 3 compartments 1st one of bliss( age group 0-10) 2nd horror( 11-20, with puberty, pimples, college- came a lot of horrors I would rather forget) and 3rd of enlightenment( 21-30) . I guess the best has been the last 10 years, simply because I got to learn a lot of things in life. Past 3 years have been even better. I entered a new phase in life which surprised/astonished/scared/ and made me go through many more emotions. The good thing about it all was I became a better person. It was a beautiful discovery of what a nice and terrible person I can be .

I stand at "coming soon 30" and I am wondering in the next 2 and half months. I need to set a goal to do something, which challenges me further. what can that be? Well let the thought process begin.

2010-04-02T16:54:00.002+05:00

Threads

Bound on the wrist,

Expressions defined

Music floats

Dancing doll

Tap Tap Tap

Hands and legs

Side, front and back

Sit!!!! Stand!!

Bend!! Stretch!!

Movements set

Smiles drawn

Blank!! Blurred!!

“Twinkling” eyes,

Dancing doll

Tap Tap Tap

Hands and legs

Side, front and back

Train Diaries

2010-02-26T14:45:00.001+05:00

Overheard on the train.

A salesman selling imitation gold jewelry at 20 rupees a chain

"sone se kam nahi, khone ka gham nahi"

Mumbai Local- Truly the lifeline of Mumbai.

2010-01-31T11:41:00.001+05:00

Tommy Alse

18th June 1994- 31st January 2010.

Joys and Sorrow,

Highs and Lows,

Licks and Barks,

Hugs and Kisses,

Adorable eyes and patient ears.

You will be in our hearts forever...

Take a bite

2009-11-20T16:57:00.000+05:00

Its very easy to assume that feeding someone for a day, will change that persons life forever and bring a smile. One lunch cant stay for a life time and thats why we all study, get a job and work.

So why doesnt the same logic apply to beggars, street kids, underprivileged kids????

Feeding a child on Christmas, Diwali, New Year might take the guilt off your mind, but might not help the child. Why not make the child stand on its own feet, be educated and grow up to become a successful individual ?

Hope someone takes a bite into this thought.

June 12th is World Anti-Child Labour Day

2009-06-12T17:44:00.006+06:00

Did you know that India has the highest number of child laborers in the world? Forced out of school, and compelled to work by circumstances and systems that deprive them of several Child Rights.

As people who believe in Child Rights, we hold that any child who is below the age of 14 yrs should be in School, not at Work Support CRY in its stand against Child labor CRY is organizing a Photo Signature Campaign from 12th June to 15th August 2009. And is seeking your support.

All you need to do is

Click Photos….. Yours, your friends holding a placard with the following message ‘ Send Children to School, Not to Work’ in as creative a manner as possible. Upload them on Education - every child's Right (CRY) on Facebook.

And ...

We at CRY will collect these photo signatures and use them to build pressure on the government to address the root causes of Child Labour and to implement effective/efficient rehabilitation policies. And build awareness on the issue.

To know more about CRY and the work that CRY does click here

Vodafone Woes

2009-05-10T19:24:00.002+06:00

The zoo zoo is making news, but what actually needs to make news about vodafone right now is the pathetic service they provide and the rude customer care associates they have employed. Vodafone needs to rethink its tag line happy to help since for past 1 month they have been very unhappy to help or rather too indifferent to even care about the customers problem and have caused more anguish.

The story goes thus. as a very loyal vodafone customer, I refused to take an IDEA or LOOP connection as soon as I landed in Mumbai. After nearly 10 months of being a pre-paid connection customer I decided to change to post paid and approached a Vodafone Mini Store to change my connection. I curse my stars for this decision. The nice smiling customer care associate and the store owner or who ever he was confirmed that they would activate my connetion in just a day and made me pay for a 400/- Rs post paid sim. They also asked me to insert the sim the next day as the phone can only be activated if it is done so. the next morning I got a call from vodafone customer care stating that the address verification had been done and my line would be activated that evening. a day went past and my line was not activated. I called up customer care and they assured that the line would be activated in 2 days. I waited for 2 days and no one called me to state why the line was not activated or when the line would be activated
I called up the customer care number 111 only to be told that they cant activate my account since the address proof was not valid which I thought sounded foolish since they verified and confirmed my existence and I had provided them with my rent agreement copy, my marriage certificate and my pan card copy. When i stated that, the lady on the phone said that the franking on my rent agreement had to be done on all pages. well sadly the Govt of India believes in franking only on the first page and hence I had no choice but to accept what the govt says. This irritated me and I asked them why they had confirmed that my line would be active by the previous nite if there was a problem. The call was transferred to their supervisor and the lady rudely told me that it was not her problem but I had to check with the store where I purchased the sim card. Yeah Right!!! so Vodafone states that giving wrong information to a customer thru their customer service line is not their problem but someone elses.
I went back to the store only to be asked to submit an NOC and identity proof of the owner of the house which we have rented, which I did after a week. Next I was given the same assurance and i waited for nearly a week for verification and activation. No one from vodafone called me to inform the status till I got bugged of waiting and called them.The customer service associate as usual told me that my documents were not enuf and asked me to submit a ration card.The last I knew ration cards are applied for by people who want to avail the govt approved antyodaya scheme and fortunately I dont belong there. I had clearly asked while applying if bank documents can be applied for as proof, which the guys rejected. The Customer service associate Raj Sagar had no knowledge about what I was talking and also refused to connect me to the duty manager or his supervisor who could help me with this. on top of it he was rude and abused and raised his voice to state that He would not transfer to call and I can do whatever I please and disconnected the call. So much for being "happy to help" In the end I was frustrated and my husband decided to call on my behalf. The call was transferred 5 times and everytime we had to state the problen that we faced to each and every one of them. In the end my husband spoke to a supervisor named alex who wasnt of much help. when my husband stated that if they could not accept a genuine rent agreement document which the govt doesnt frank on all pages but puts the franking seal on only one page, we have no alternative but to forge the document and present it to them. The stupid supervisor said" Yes Sir!!!" shocked by this my husband asked again if he approved of submitting forged documents and the answer was the same. My husband repeated the same thing again and asked again if the Supervisor and vodafone endorsed submitting fake documents to get a new connection. The supervisor said," yes Sir I agree with you".
So if you are planning to apply for a new vodafone connection, be prepared to undergo such torture and meet such dumb associates who do not believe in their own company tag line. I would be glad if vodafone spends more money on training their associates than on advertising IPL Matches. As far as my phone application is concerned. I am going to stop my pre-paid vodafone connection and shift to IDEA or LOOP who in my opinion have better connectivity in mumbai than Vodafone.

Social responsibility- My two pence.

2009-03-27T10:55:00.003+05:00

I wonder if being socially responsible has become a new fashion accesory. I can see so many celebs endorsing different social projects these days. Though the look of it is all good. I hope that this " being socially responsible fad" doesnt fade off and brings in some change in attitudes of people.

A day back I had this discussion with someone about an In- store promotion. The whole theme of the in store promotion was to help kids enjoy a festival and an elaborate plan was being made to include the "less fortunate beings". The idea was of a promotion wherein the underprivileged children would be asked to come to a store , show their face and play with the" more privileged" kids and take picures with them. This whole event was supposed to " bring a smile" on the face of the "underprivileged". The whole idea left me speechless. not with awe but with anger.

Would taking pictures one day of the year, making an "underprivileged" kid stand in a store, showcase his/her poverty and be more aware of the difference between him/her self and the rich kid playing with them ,be a way of bringing a smile on the "underprivileged", marginalised kid??

What shocked me was the whole thought process of what will be a successful way of initiating interaction with the " less fortunate". IMO this whole plan ended up projecting the "less fortunate" as the zoo monkey. People come to visit this creature once in a year, play and interact with it and the story of interaction temporarily stopped till another festive opportunity arrived, making the " more privileged" to go on his annual visit.

( There are more thoughts which need to be moderated and thought over before being spilt on this paper. The emotions are being controlled cos angry mind sometimes cant reason well. hence this post would be continued later.)

vermilion

2008-06-13T15:55:00.005+06:00

The green bangles jingle,
The fragrant henna
still fresh on my palms,
The turmeric smeared
thread smiles
Anklets tingle
happiness
The vermilion
on my forehead.

Tagged Again: Know your alphabets

2008-04-24T14:54:00.002+05:00

Tagged by Prashant
A - Available?
Anytime for animals.
B – Best Friend:
Chidanand Patwardhan. & Deepak Alse. Two people who have stood by me come rain or sunshine.
C – Cake or Pie?
Cake any day, Yummier when it comes with nice cream icing.
D – Drink of Choice:
Fresh Fruit Juice & Wine ( Not together of course)
E – Essential thing used every day:
Money.
F – Favourite Colour:
Lavender
G – Gummi Bears or Worms:
Pass.
H – Hometown:
Mumbai & Bangalore. Love them both
I – Indulgence:
Poetry & Photography.
J – January or February:
February, I am a die hard romantic
K – Kids and Names:
I love Kids both Human & Animal. Names??? let me think. I like unique ones, very rarely found, like mine and my husbands name.
L – Life:
Life is beautiful
M – Marriage:
A little bit of everything, love, sharing, compromise, fights, nudges, snuggles.....
N – Number of siblings:
One and I couldnt have asked for anyone better than the one I have.
O – Oranges or Apples:
Apples, Oranges are not good for the throat of a Radio Jockey :D
P – Phobia:
I see dead people.
Q – Quote:
The ones which mom keeps on telling every single day to me. and there are many to note down here.
R - Reason to Smile:
Innocence.
S – Season:
All of them, they are all beautiful in their own way.
T – Tag three people
Whoever wants to write this tag can feel free to do so.
U – Unknown fact about me:
I can churn out the best Carrot halwa, Now people who know me very well and believe that I am worst cook possible, this is a fact. Ask the number of relatives who have tasted my own recipe of carrot halwa,they can vouch for the carrot halwa I make :D
V – Vegetable you do not like:
Brinjal & Thondekai.
W – Worst Habit:
Biting Nails.
X-rays you have had:
Many, I have been disasters favorite child.
Y – Your favourite food:
Fruit Salad.
Z – Zodiac:
Libra.

2008-04-01T12:18:00.003+05:00

Happy Womans Day

2008-03-08T15:28:00.002+05:00

Happy Womans day,

Here is some food for thought. I happened to talk to a so called highly educated liberal man today only to conclude thus

"A succesful woman has achieved it because of her body." said the man.
Men who think that women can only win with their bodies are actually exposing their own character flaw and reiterate that even today, maximum percentage of men educated or otherwise still refuse to accept women as their equal and still want her to be their door mat.:

I for one refuse to be so

2008-01-22T22:39:00.000+05:00

Moonlight played the peeping tom,
Those soft sheets of passion
the feeling of your warmth
Present but not by my side
A shy smile, closed eyes,
Thoughts engulf every breath,
the tingle felt though not touched.
Longing swallowed
Question asked and answered,
I hold on tight to the pillow.
Coy & Happy

My community dogs

2007-11-15T22:07:00.000+05:00

Rani-1

Rani-2

Blackie/Kariya/Putta ( He has many names)

The Shy old man- Brownie

These are my community dogs, very friendly, adopted by half the people around. They play with me. Let me pick them up, pamper them, take them to the vet. even let the vet give injections when I am holding them ( Except brownie who is the shy one who doesnt let anyone touch but is harmless) These dogs are my darlings and they are completely at ease with Nithya and Tom. They go out for walks with mom every morning and evening. So mom has enough body guards with her while she heads out for her walk early morning. Do take care of your community dogs.Love them and they will give you all the love back in double.

" If wishes were horses"

2007-10-17T22:07:00.000+05:00

She ran past me,
Everyday
I see those colourful dresses,
bright red, orange and blue,
on the pavements,
a little after 8.

Buyers keep looking
to get the best
for the night,
measuring everything
without a measure.

They had a guest today
who joined them,
on their walk.
A wicked grin on one.
I saw her run.

The saree was risen
up to her knee
A sight of pleasure
for a vouyeur passing by.
The Pallu fell
like it does everyday.
But today they moved for
a different reason.

The man in Khakhi followed
trying to match the pace,
restrained,
by the bulging potbelly.
She ran past me.
His grin told it all.
She ran and ran.

The buyers looked.
It was entertainment,
as always.
The grin turned
into a laugh.

I kept looking
She ran past me
like a horse
and he followed
enjoying the chase.

CUPA Update

2007-09-28T21:11:00.000+05:00

Link from adopt strays

These lost/abandoned dogs are currently at Cupa Shelter, Hebbal. These are initial pictures and ofcorse they will be made ready for adoption as in to say, helath check, vaccination, groomed, etc. before they come to you. They are between 2-3 years of age and a little care and lots of love will do wonders for them. Please feel free to mail, drop a comment if you wish to adopt them or know someone who would.
Also, Yasmine is fostering a beautiful calico kitten and I have a braveheart pup, which needs a forever home. Do let us know if you would like to learn more. Meanwhile, check these three babies and others in our posts below this.

Post by Sushruta

Twenty Six

2007-09-28T18:01:00.000+05:00

I stopped
to see someone
who looked like me

"Welcome" she said
and I looked at the pasture
behind her
The meadow was spread
wide and green
"Tempting" said I
And looked back
Nostalgia struck
and I refused to move

She burst into a giggle
and said
"what are you holding on to?,
Every year you try and I win"
I agreed and embraced
Twenty Six and more to come
With a smile and my head held high
I welcomed her into my life
and looked content
into the promising shades of green

Just a moment

2007-09-12T22:22:00.000+05:00

I can hear her breathing. Her paws on my pillow. Sleeping peacefully, content and satisfied after a nice meal. Raindrops singing a beautiful tune.Sometimes a passing motorcycle adds flavour to the music thats being played by nature. Calm wednesday night, I stare at technology. The other little one is barking, seeking attention, unable to see life around. Colours meant a lot to him before, but now age took those colours away. But that doesnt stop him. I see him everyday fighting his fears, finding news ways to know where mama is, search for food, play with his pal.
Far away my other half resides. Constantly striving hard to overcome his own inhibitions. Trying to carve his world, slow and steady, carefully planned. The ones who got me into this world, smile every morning at me. tell me to wake up early but still dont wake me up early and reason out that I slept late. I smile at times when some noise awakens me and I hear them talk " Shhhhhhhh, she is sleeping, Is n't she looking so lovely while asleep, like she was when she was a kid" and they argue about it.

Life!!!!!!! Need I say more. :)

Adoptions

2007-09-01T01:05:00.000+05:00

" A lovely batch of pups looking for homes in CUPA. Check them out when you visit this Saturday, which happens to be an adoption day all year round at Cupa Shelter, UAS Campus, Opp RT Nagar Traffic police Station, Hebbal." - Sushruta

"The kittens have been vaccinated, de-wormed and kept in a clean separate area in the cattery. They are between 2-4 months and are in excellent health. So go good people, bring them home!Also there is a 2 year old cocker spaniel, black, with all his papers and vaccination records. His owners had to leave the country, which is why he is in CUPA. He is in excellent health so run and take him before he gets some shelter infection.A cream labrador, 2 years, fat and friendly wants a home too....."- Yasmine Claire

Link from Adopt-Strays

Sharkfin soup & legal issues

2007-08-31T17:31:00.000+05:00

Recently someone had left me an anonymous comment on Pradyots blog asking if serving sharkfin soup is legal. I contacted Humane Society International regarding the same and here's what Susan Prolman of HSI had to say.

"Hello Shubhaprada,

Thank you for contacting HSI.

In answer to your questions concerning legality, It is not illegal to sell and/or serve shark fin in the United States. There are numerous species of sharks. Some of these are critically endangered, endangered, or vulnerable. Fishing is not illegal for all shark species in the United States, although it is regulated.

Humane Society International is fighting for policy changes to better protect sharks at a national and international level. In addition, we are working to reduce demand by asking companies to not sell or serve dishes containing shark fin. I appreciate your concern regarding this issue. It would be most helpful if you would visit these restaurants, ask whether they serve dishes containing shark fin and, if they do, ask them to stop and provide the name of a restaurant, a contact name, and contact information to me.

You can also learn more about the issue by visiting www.hsi.org/sharks.

Thank you for your concern,

Susan

Susan Prolman, Esq.
Director of International Campaigns
Humane Society International
2100 L Street, NW
Washington, DC 20037"

2007-08-21T11:43:00.000+05:00

The infectious smile
peeping out
naughty
from her mothers lap
a shy smile
welcoming me
from the auto
next to the auto
I was in

Childhood innocent
pure, carefree
how I wish
to be back there
in those nostalgic times

These lines are for the cute little girl , I saw in an auto yesterday while coming back home from work. She was really very pretty,smiling and waving to a complete stranger like me. Such innocence. God Bless!

Independence day!!!!!!

2007-08-13T22:59:00.000+05:00

Just around the corner
I saw a young man,
Hungry, haggard.
Earning his daily bread
selling the shiny golden
badges and flags
"Jai hind" He cried
I looked at him
Patriotism fills tummies!!!

I went further
To see a jazzy showroom
decked up with lights
saffron, white and green
and there I saw the paper again
Saffron white and green
Decorating his window,
to be taken off
after a few days.
Thrown in some corner
of his godown
not bothered about
for exactly five months

I heard there was a party
My friends said " dry day,
We need to stock up"
I smiled and said enjoy
"whats the occasion?"
They proudly claimed
"60 Years of Independence "

Abhi-Ash Mania

2007-08-09T22:31:00.000+05:00

I had enough of them. Ok!! So they are gonna have a baby. Everyone has one sometime in life. Whats the big deal? Is it worth the hype thats created? Or are they giving birth to some special child with super powers?

Whats with media nowadays?

2007-07-30T22:55:00.000+05:00

Link from Adopt Strays

"Look at this gorgeous dog!! She was abandoned at Vasant Nagar and a kind girl called Shilpa, who is visiting Bangalore and is on vacation, put up this post on orkut! She found the dog near her house, scared, very thin (possible starvation) and longing to be loved!
Shilpa was kind enough to take the pup in and is looking after it.... but she will leave Bangalore in a couple of weeks and is hoping to place the pup before she leaves.... someone...please please please adopt!!!!

Name: We don't know so Soulmia temporarily christen her "Snowflake"
Age: Young - about one year
Breed: Labrador mix
Sex: Female
Nature: Inquisitive, friendly and playful "

Payback time.

2007-07-29T00:14:00.000+05:00

"Blogs are a way to capture attention, complete advertising oneself"

If you so detest it and think of it as a marketing gimmick, why are you here reading it? Go get a job.

Bliss

2007-07-25T23:43:00.000+05:00

Awake at this hour..Tom in my lap sleeping peacefully like a child after half hour of barking to complain that his tumour ( he has a tumour in his ears and is too old to be operated on) is hurting him. Feels nice to hold him like this and rock him to sleep. Who said animals cant be like children? They are exactly like children. attention seeking and innocent!!!

My pretty child sleeps peaceful and content that he is safe. :)

CUPA Newsletter

2007-07-18T21:26:00.000+05:00

CUPA is planning to come up with an online newsletter. But we aren't sure how many of you will be interested in recieving those newsletters. If any of you are, do leave your email ids in the comments section and we will keep you updated about the happenings at CUPA through our newsletters.

Do have a look at this if you are thinking of bringing home your best friend. ( Link from Adopt-A Stray)

Cross posted @ All for bow

The month that was

2007-07-11T00:18:00.000+05:00

My monthly update about my life. Who cares!!!, did i hear? Well!! I am not writing for anyone of you to be so in awe of whats happening or there is nothing so great which none of you havent gone through . My blog, so I go ranting. Read if you please or else why are you still staring at the screen?

Quite an eventful month I must say. I have been going through a phase what they all call growing up. Work brings a lot of responsibilities. Of course I expected it, Somehow feels nice to learn business and play the game, gives me a kick, by the end of the day. I am somewhat satisfied with what I learn.

Personal life is next to none, cos I work weird timings. The moment I come home, all I want is home food, A good nights sleep,Mom,her warm hug and her constant questioning about my health- which off-late has not been great. Mommies are the best. I cant imagine squeezing in so much work and patiently taking all the tantrums. Mom has been getting lunch and breakfast ready for me before I leave for work. She packs everything neat seperate and every morning I have mom feed me breakfast to ensure I dont miss it while rushing to work. What would I have done without you mom? I so love you.

I also realised that the world means a lot to me. Sometimes I want to help people even if i dont know them. Many of my friends argued that there are times when things are out of control and I shouldnt feel bad if I am unable to help someone in need, But I do feel guilty. My logic is that If we all think that its ok not to help a stranger, sooner the world will be a cruel place where everyone is indifferent to others needs. anyway thats my personal opinion.

My count of doggies is increasing, Now I have 3 more dogs added to the list. Rani, after her operation has been demanding more attention and now 3 more male dogs have joined her.It feels nice to be welcomed by 6 dogs when I come home. Nittu and Tom have been a bit jealous. But Rani, BiLli, Browny and Karia are enjoying the attention they get. and I love being loved by them. They just jump and play around the moment they see me. They are nice stressbusters every day after work. The moment I get down from the auto, there they are wagging their tails and demanding attention.

Radio continues. Had taken a weeks break cos I was suffering from bad laryngitis and the doc advised me to talk less and not strain my voice box. On the road to recovery still, My throat is slowly feeling better.

2007-07-07T01:11:00.001+05:00

Blank,
A Void,
a deep sea
and a few coral
a filter
and a sponge
squeezed out on earth
the sun hit hard
dry,
Slowly crawled
the snail
back to the sea,
and with it
came the
coral
feeding and filtering
back to the
same routine
the familiar path
welcomes
with warmth

( To be edited later.)

People and Manners

2007-06-22T22:56:00.000+05:00

I just went through a very irritating experience. Many people claim to be educated, roam around in their expensive cars, but what they lack is basic manners. I have one such neighbour. The man owns a big house and a nice car, wears brands,but in the end lacks basic manners and etiquette.

At eleven in the night, this man bangs at my door first and then rings the bell to say that a stray dog was sleeping at our doorstep and that was problematic. Before any of you jump and say his reasons were valid, let me tell you that I had no issues with his complaint and I agree that I need to ensure that those dogs are not a problem to my neighbours. But at the same time eleven in the night is no friggin time to knock at someones door to complain.That too when they are sleeping and their daughter is the only one awake Moreover the problem would have been solved even if the man had knocked at my door step tomorrow morning.

Money doesnt define ones class. Expensive cars, branded clothes come and go, what matters is your manners.

A visit to the Nizams Courtyard

2007-06-11T21:16:00.001+05:00

Last Weekend I was in the Nizam's Courtyard. Had been to Hyderabad on work. Caught the evening flight to Hyderabad with Pradyot who had come to Bangalore. We landed at Hyderabad airport at about 8 in the night. The city really looked like the Nizams treasury, So many colourful lights, When You land at Bangalore, It doesnt look so crammed with lights, there are dark portions, But Hyderabad is crowded with colorful lights, From the plane, It looks exactly like a trunk, full of jewels.

I guess people in Hyderabad do believe in living life Nizam style. Everywhere I could see huge 3-4 storey Bungalows, each house equipped with their own personal Gym, Lawn, lavish furniture and interiors. Good for people who are into interiors and furniture business I must say.

I was staying at ISB, with Pradyot. A real calm and beautiful campus. I did see a many wild animals around, roaming free and unharmed. I saw a snake, Peacock, did see something like a fox, not sure if it was a fox though. But many students have confirmed the existence of a fox there.

The stay in all was good except for the traffic. Next time anyone complains about traffic in Bangalore, I would ask them to visit Hyderabad. With roads twice the size of roads in Bangalore, I was still stuck in jams everywhere. People have no traffic sense. Everyone, right from Govt buses to private vehicle owners do not follow traffic rules. Wonder how pedestrians manage to cross the road, cos I didnt see any vehicle stopping for signal to go completely green anywhere.

That was Hyderabad/Cyberabad or the Nizams courtyard for me. Back in Namma Bengalooru

Forwards

2007-06-11T21:13:00.000+05:00

Normally I dont read forwards. They are directly disposed off to the bin. But I kinda liked this one. Agree with most of it.

T h e B e s t M o me n t s I n Li f e

1. Falling in love.

2. Laughing till your stomach hurts.

3. Enjoying a ride down the country side.

4. Listening to your favorite song on the radio.

5. Going to sleep listening to the rain pouring outside.

6. Getting out of the shower and wrapping yourself with a warm, fuzzy towel.

7. Passing your final exams with good grades.

8. Being a part of an interesting conversation.

9. Finding some money in some old pants.

10. Laughing at yourself.

11. Sharing a wonderful dinner with all your friends.

12. Laughing without a reason.

13. "Accidentally" hearing someone say somthing good about you.

14. Watching the sunset.

15. Listening to a song that reminds you of an important person in your life.

16. Receiving or giving your first kiss.

17. Feeling this buzz in your body when seeing this "special" someone.

18. Having a great time with your friends.

19. Seeing the one you love happy.

20. Wearing the shirt of a person you love and smelling his/her perfume.

21. Visiting an old friend of yours and remembering great memories.

22. Hearing someone telling you "I LOVE YOU"

&
ABOVE ALL - REACHING THE TARGET SET BY YOU......... ...

Update on Rani(Putti), the stray dog

2007-06-08T14:28:00.000+05:00

Rani (Putti) came back to our locality today, She has been vaccinated and sterilised at CUPA. What touched me was, as soon as she came, she first headed to the Garage where her pups were kept and for 4 hours she kept whining and barking at my door, questioning me about her pups. I had no answers to give, for her pups are now at CUPA , available for adoption. Her maternal instincts brought a smile as well as a tear in my eyes.

Animals understand relationships so well.

Update on the Pug I wanted to adopt

2007-06-07T21:18:00.000+05:00

The Pug got adopted, Not by me, but by another lady who had already expressed her desire to adopt him. She has also got him a walker so that he can move around. I hope he enjoys his walk and lives a happy life..

Thank you who ever you are for adopting him, God Bless!!!!!

Pappu Pass ho gaya!!!!! Me got my MA results.

2007-06-07T19:06:00.000+05:00

Yippie Yay Yay. I got my results and Pappu pass ho gayi.. Got 1st class marks. I have never bothered about my exam results and have always been the average marks category student. But when I started with my MA classes, I had made a pledge that I would score 1st class in my MA and try and see how it feels to score well. I kept up my promise to myself. Scoring 1st class in MA is a herculean task. Its not as easy as it seems. Glad to have touched that milestone. More glad to have achieved what I set out to achieve. Feeling Proud!!!

More milestones to be achieved,
More roads to travel,
More ambitions to fulfill.
The path aint easy
But I wont stop here
Heart craves to explore,
to cross the limits
to exceed those imaginary boundaries..

Status Change

2007-06-04T23:49:00.000+05:00

From Unemployed to employed,

Yup I found a job I know I would enjoy, Radio Jockeying will continue, for my bosses are kind and nice people who think I shouldnt stop enjoying my hobbies, just because they decided to hire me. So glad I found such bosses. Thank you thank you my bosses..

By the way, Me going to be in Hyderabad this weekend for the induction, Now I couldn't have asked for a better place than that, Could I? :)

So Shubhs will be busy from now on, working 7 days a week. But will blog about her insignificant * grin grin* life whenever she finds some free time..

2007-06-03T15:07:00.000+05:00

Feminists don't have it easy. There are a few men who state that if you are a feminist you can't behave in a certain way. When I did my research on the institution of marriage in India, I asked people what they felt about extramarital affairs, pre-marital sex and many related questions. I had a few people complaining that feminists refusing sexual exploration are not feminists at all but hypocrites. That came as a surprise. All feminists are not bra burners, nor are they marriage breakers neither do all of them indulge in pre-marital sex. Feminism for heavens sake is all about choice and letting the woman make her choice in life.

Being a feminist, I know I have my negotiations to make. After all I am a part of the society which is patriarchal, ( I oppose it, or agree to it, It doesnt matter). As a feminist, I have had to make my difficult choices, for parents, for family, for my boyfriend, for friends. Its not easy to rebel when you know that eighty percent of people might be branding you, or are looking at you as a misfit. There are doubts and times when one does wonder if the battle of sexes really worth it? or if one is just fighting for the heck of it. Ideals make us fight, but at times one has to give in to the pressures of the society they live in.

A feminist is still a woman, and very much a part of the social system put in place for ages now. She would rebel, but in the end she is still part of a family and does desire to be a daughter, a mother, a wife, a friend and maintain her relationships.

Learning to Live

2007-06-03T14:09:00.000+05:00

Tagged .
Burnt.
tears.
salty disguise.
memories
No!!!!!
Nightmares.
Past.
Haunt.
Yardsticks.
A long winding road
An escape
A closed pathway
A ray of dark hope
Legs tired
Thorny paths
Hope, expectations
More and more
Drowning voices
Stifled cries
A full stop.
A comma,
Maybe a semicolon;
what punctuations ???
Choice????
Choose this
choose that,
marketing gimick
Business of life
Politics
Learning the tricks
Still learning.

Update on Puppies

2007-06-03T12:52:00.000+05:00

The puppies are at CUPA right now. So do call CUPA at 2297300/2297301

I had been to CUPA shelter today. Was moved to see a pug, who is paralysed and can't move his hind legs. He is not up for adoption, for he cant move and it requires a lot of patience and time to take care of him. Wish he is up for foster parent adoption. I would love to adopt him. He is very sweet but is paralysed. He crawled towards me, when he saw me and I held him in my arms. A brave child. Do pray that he is available for foster parent adoption so that I can add him to my family.

For all puppies and doggies..

2007-05-31T23:22:00.000+05:00

The little yelps
Eyes unopened
Sniffing the scent
of milk
"Mommy....."
They cried

A human stood
looking at them
Brown and Black..
Yellow and White
Smelling of their own poo.
Suckling on my fingers
Dirty little babies!!!

"Salty milk?"
"this aint milk"
The smart one declared
" This aint mommy either"
Yelp Yelp!! Little bow wows
They crawled away from me

"Putti...!!!,
Here are your babies
Covered with poo"
Mommy looked
"come come come,
My hungry puppies"

The babies slept
suckling on
mommies breast
Putti smiled,

Ah!! such are the joys of motherhood

This poem is for the 5 new born pups and their mom Putti, who has been living in our locality since God knows when. And yup, I cleaned the puppies and washed my hands too. He he he.

Pups for adoption

2007-05-31T22:51:00.000+05:00

5 Stray pups are up for adoption. They were born just 10 days back. Myself and my neighbours are taking care of them now. In 10 days, these pups would be up for adoption at CUPA ( I would be leaving them at CUPA and also get the mom sterilised). They are a cute bunch ( 4 females & 1 male)
It would be great if anyone of you want to adopt even one of them. I wont be able to upload the pictures for my camera has konked. But if anyone is interested, do send me a mail on soultrot@yahoo.com.

And he becomes a Radio Jockey

2007-05-20T16:45:00.000+05:00

And now its Pradyots turn to be a radio jockey. Yup Pradyot is doing radio shows on his campus radio station. This is going to be interesting. Only problem, people who are students and staff of ISB can listen to his shows and I cant even get a copy of it :(

Hope I get to listen atleast one link sometime. After all, I need to see how much of my radio shows have rubbed off on him. * just joking*, I truly wish I get some bits of the recording to listen to.

All the best dear, I hope you rock the airwaves..

2007-05-20T15:50:00.000+05:00

Those words on the screen
Lighted up my evening
I probed, trying to find out
answers to my doubts
secretly hoping
that what I was to hear
was what I expected to hear
Anticipation, anxiety
my heart skipped a beat
smiled, overjoyed
It danced, but also
questioned its joys
hoped that things would
be fine, touch wood
( touched her own head)
A year later I look back
and have a content smile.
Thinking that I
cleared that milestone
of being together for 365 days
Days full of joy,
of happiness, arguements, fights
Love and more...
More is yet to come
And more is what I ask for.
This aint a poem
But just a flux of thoughts
running through and round
Poems are edited
to be consumed
and my thoughts
flow free on this blank sheet
to be sent to the one
far away from my eyes at present
but always a part of
every single moment of my life
and would be for the rest of my life.

Happy anniversary to us.. :)

Bisilubadnekai

2007-05-14T20:35:00.000+05:00

For those who dont know kannada the literal translation would be " sun brinjal". but what the phrase bisilubadnekai means is explained later in my post, So lazy people read on,

I am back from mumbai. Not looking too great. All tanned inspite of generously using sunblock creams. This is to prove that none of the creams provide any protection in reality. Or maybe this holds true in Mumbai, where even a cap doesnt help. I was sweating like anything.Caps and umbrellas were too uncomfortable.

I am tanned but I enjoyed the tan. After so many years I was back in the place where I was born, and I met my school friends too. About 12 of us met up ( half of them are abroad, thanks to software boom). We went to our school and sat on the same old benches and took pictures. It was so nostalgic. I took a piece of chalk and wrote names of all naughty guys whose names I used to write on the board when I was the class monitor. We all had dinner together after 10 years. It was touching. I am not sure if we all will be able to meet up again in the near future.

I ate and ate and ate. Vada pav, sabudana khichdi, All mumbai chaat. Interestingly they had new additions. one of them was Chinese bhel!!! though I didnt venture into tasting it. I prefer my good old Bhel. I shopped, shopped, shopped. For clothes ofcourse! One should not lose the opportunity when one gets cotton salwars for less than half the rate of what we get here in Bangalore. So all I did was eat-sleep-shop-read.

In all it was fun. Now to bisilubadnekai. It just means that I am tanned and sun burnt. To add to the woes, Mumbai still has eight hour power cuts in the central suburbs. So for someone who has been in Bangalore for six years and so used to the pleasant weather here, Mumbai was intolerably hot

As soon as I landed at Bangalore airport I decided to play a joke on a auto guy here. I dont look like a South Indian or Maharashtrian girl.I look more like a Punjabi. ( most of my friends say so) So I caught hold of one auto guy, asked him if he would take me to my destination in hindi. The guy looked at me and he said yes.
I again asked in hindi " Kitna loge bhaisaheb?" He looked again and said " 200 madam, Do sau" And I had to give it back to him in Kannada " Yenri? Yaaranna bakra maadthaidhira? Allige hogodhakke bari 70-75 rupees aagodhu, Yen kannada barolla antha thilidukondu topi haakokke nodhthira?" I wish I had a camera to capture the exact emotions of the auto guy. Wish we could somehow book complaints on such guys. If you all remember about a year back I had written a post about a guy named Babu, who plies an autorickshaw, He had come all the way searching for my mother because she had left her medical report in his auto. He didnt even wait till I could reward him and left. I hope and pray he is doing good business and is living a happy life. Thanks to a few guys like the one i met today, most auto guys are always looked on with suspicion.

Anyway, Now that I am back. I have lot of time in hand. I got some nice fabric paints and some nice designs ( I love painting pots and cloth. Its a hobby) So I will sit and paint after two years. Would put up pictures of the same once I am done. C ya all.

Off to Mumbai.

2007-05-04T14:30:00.000+05:00

Its been 4 years since I have been to Mumbai. But now I am off to mumbai. Wont be in town till the 15th. Going to relax, meeting my school pals and also my grandparents.

C ya all once I am back in town.

By the way, many friends are going to celebrate their birthdays next week so happy birthday to Anjaan, Prashanth A.P, Vyasa, and also to RJ Sandeep. Hope you guys have a blast.

2007-04-28T21:46:00.000+05:00

"My best friends wedding" Watched the movie for the 20th time and cried watching the end scene. Mush pot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! did I hear someone say that? *giggles*

Some movies I just cant stop watching, even if I have watched them 'n' number of times.
1) You've got mail
2) When Harry met Sally
3) Truth about cats and dogs ( Is on Star many times, It aint no movie about animal welfare, But really nice)
4) Jaane bhi do yaaro
5) Stop or my mom will shoot

Yes me a comedy buff,

The rest would fall under the category of "arty" movie as everyone calls it
6) Astitva
7) Dweepa
8) Matadaana
9) Terrorist
Many more the names I dont recall now.. Will update later.

Finally

2007-04-28T21:21:00.002+05:00

Finally, I am a Post Graduate. Next what??? For now a job, Later in a few years I might think of doing some feminist research. I dont want to study for a few years, Just work and earn some green leaves.

Happenings in past one month!!! Pradyot left for Hyderabad for his MBA at ISB. Deeps who was supposed to be back in India by now aint coming for a few more months. Two of the most important men in my life and both away from me. I miss them both so much.No one to argue with, no one to fight with, no one to be possesive about, no one to show all my nakhras. No one who would take all my nakhras. No one to say I have a cute nose or that I am a crazy nut. Hmmmmmm.. Deepsie and Pradyot come back soon.

Studies and projects happened. I scored well in all and I was happy. Then came exams, they werent that tough either. So happy now that I am a free bird..... for a while. But cant wait to get back to reading and books. Have you gone through this feeling? The exams over and you still want to study and you suddenly feel that some theorists was actually trying to say something else and you had interpreted it all wrong till now? I am feeling so. Thats why I have loads of reading to do. Books Books. I so love them.

Radio was missing from my life thanks to exams. But "Evenflow" will be back on the airwaves from this week. Missed doing my shows. Missed my listeners and their dedications.

Made some new interesting friends in the last month with similar interests in books and music. Conversations are also interesting.

Guess I will be blogging more often now. Idle mans/womans mind is devils workshop. so I will put the mind to good use. Working on a poem now, also trying to write a short story. Hope I succeed in a few days time.

2007-04-18T11:53:00.000+05:00

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

Untitled

2007-04-02T21:42:00.000+05:00

And I stared ,
at the people passing by.
the bright neon lights
staring at me....blank
like my mind.
Characters just moving ,
giving a glimpse of a part
of their vast experiences.
and I looked at them
wondered if they felt like i did.
did they know ?
Inside me a thought visited ,
put a question mark on my face.
It swimmed
through every part .
I could feel it moving
The muscles twitching
the woman in me
felt a twinge
of guilt
of sorrow
I tried to explain
but somewhere it said
why do u try ?
why should you ?
for sometimes
they are not required
No matter what
explanations wont satisfy .
they never would
Thoughts wont dissapear
with logical reasoning
they stay
fresh in your mind
only to hide somewhere
to resurface
when you least expect
them to rise
but the calm
hides the storm
the face lies.
the eyes look blank
as the passer by audience
too engrossed in their lives
moves alongside
staring with those blank eyes

Take That - Shine

2007-03-31T22:18:00.001+05:00

The men look old.. No more the only boy band I liked.. and I miss Robbie..

The bundle of joy!!

2007-03-30T20:31:00.000+05:00

My child!! Nithya, My baby.The bundle of joy turned 4 today.

"Save the sari"

2007-03-26T23:05:00.000+05:00

Save the sari from a sorry fate
SHASHI THAROOR
"Having just returned from a quick trip to India, i am moved to an urgent query: whatever became of the sari? For centuries, if not millennia, the alluring garment, all five or six or nine yards of it, has been the defining drape of Indian womanhood. Cotton or silk, Banarasi or Pochampalli, shimmering Kanjeevaram or multi-coloured bandhani, with the pallav draped frontto-back over the left shoulder or in the Gujarati style back-to-front over the right, the sari has stood the test of time, climate and body shape. Of all the garments yet invented by man (or, not to be too sexist about it, mankind) the sari did most to flatter the wearer. Unlike every other female dress on the planet, the sari could be worn with elegance by women of any age, size or shape: you could never be too fat, too short or too ungainly to look good in a sari. Indeed, if you were stout, or bowlegged, or thickwaisted, nothing concealed those handicaps of nature better than the sari. Women looked good in a sari who could never have got away with appearing in public in a skirt. So why has this masterpiece of feminine attire begun fading from our streets? On recent visits home to India i have begun to notice fewer and fewer saris in our public places, and practically none in the workplace. The salwar kameez, the trouser and even the Western dress-suit have begun to supplant it everywhere. And this is not just a northern phenomenon, the result of the increasing dominance of our culture by Punjabi-ised folk who think nothing of giving masculine names to their daughters. At a recent press conference i addressed in Thiruvanathapuram, there were perhaps a dozen women journalists present. Only one was wearing a sari: the rest, all Keralites without exception, were in salwar-kameezes. And when i was crass enough to ask why none of the “young ladies” present wore saris, the one who did modestly suggested that she was no longer very young. Youth clearly has something to do with it; very few of today’s under-30 women seem to have the patience for draping a sari, and few of them seem to think it suitable for the speed with which they scurry through their lives. (“Try rushing to catch a bus in a sari,” one young lady pointedly remarked, “and you’ll switch to jeans the next day.”) But there’s also something less utilitarian about their rejection of the sari for daily wear. Today’s younger generation of Indian women seem to associate the garment with an earlier era, a more traditional time when women did not compete on equal terms in a man’s world. Putting on pants, or a Western woman’s suit, or even desi leggings in the former of a salwar, strikes them as more modern.Freeing their legs to move more briskly than the sari permits is, it seems, a form of liberation; it removes a self-imposed handicap, releasing the wearer from all the cultural assumptions associated with the traditional attire. I think this is actually a great pity. One of the remarkable aspects of Indian modernity has always been its unwillingness to disown the past; from our nationalists and reformers onwards, we have always asserted that Indians can be modern in ancient garb. Political ideas derived from nineteenth and twentiethcentury thinkers have been articulated by men in mundus and dhotis that have not essentially changed since they were first worn 2,000 or 3,000 years ago. (Statuary from the days of the Indus Valley Civilisation more than 4,000 years ago show men draped in waistcloths that Mr Karunanidhi would still be happy to don.) Gandhiji demonstrated that one did not have to put on a Western suit to challenge the British empire; when criticised by the British press for calling upon the King in his simple loincloth, the Mahatma mildly observed, “His Majesty was wearing enough clothes for the two of us”. Where a Kemal Ataturk in Turkey banned his menfolk’s traditional fez as a symbol of backwardness and insisted that his compatriots don Western hats, India’s nationalist leaders not only retained their customary headgear, they added the defiantly desi ‘Gandhi cap’ (oddly named, since Gandhiji himself never wore one). Our clothing has always been part of our sense of authenticity. I remember being struck, on my first visit to Japan some 15 years ago, by the ubiquitousness of Western clothing in that Asian country. Every Japanese man and woman in the street, on the subway or in the offices i visited wore suits and skirts and dresses; the kimono and its male equivalent were preserved at home, and brought out only for ceremonial occasions. An Asian ambassador told me that envoys were expected to present their credentials to the Emperor in a top hat and tails. This thoroughgoing Westernisation was the result of a conscious choice by the modernising Meiji Emperor in 1868. One sees something similar in China today: though the transformation is not nearly as complete as in Japan, the streets of Beijing and Shanghai are more and more thronged with Chinese people in Western clothes. In both Japan and China, i allowed myself to feel a perverse pride that we in India were different: we had entered the 21st century in clothes that our ancestors had sported for much of the preceding 20. Today, i wonder if i’ve been too complacent. What will happen once the generation of women who grew up routinely wearing a sari every day dies out? The warning signs are all around us now. It would be sad indeed if, like the Japanese kimono, the sari becomes a rare and exotic garment in its own land, worn only to temples and weddings. Perhaps it’s time to appeal to the women of India to save the sari from a sorry fate.

* Emphasis mine
This article was taken from the TOI, " All that matters" dated 25th March.2007

My arguement

Which parts of India did he actually visit to conclude thus? There are many women even in the Metropolitan cities who still drape a saree to work,every single day.
By stating that saree defines Indian womanhood,one silences the fact that the saree is not the only clothing that defines Indian Womanhood, Woman all over India have been wearing Salwar Kurtas, Lehengas, Ghaghra-Cholis and many other types of dresses.
What is this whole talk about sari covering the handicaps of woman. A woman who doesnt have the perfect hour glass figure needs to be considered a handicap? ? Clap clap clap
Though I might agree that salwar -kurta is not the dress of South Indian woman, I would still like to ask , if a woman is comfortable wearing a Salwar -Kurta , why cant she? Why call it a dominance of Punjabi culture on South India? What about the womans choice to wear the clothes she wants to wear?
I would want to see Mr Tharoor wearing a dhoti /veshti/ Kurta pajama/Panche or any of the traditional Indian masculine attire to work everyday. Shirts,pants,Suits are western attires. And Gandhiji himself said that we need not wear western attires, whats stopping Shashi tharoor?
Maybe we also need to get the symbols of Indian masculinity out in the public and not restrict them to our private spheres.

Talking about Dhotis, The principal of our college scolded an undergraduate boy, because he was wearing a dhoti on ethnic day. And according to him boys should not have worn dhotis, but women had to wear sarees. I didnt understand why? Dhoti aint ethnic? (The men were decently clad so the question of indecency didnt arise).

Women always have to be the carriers of culture, Isnt it?

Others who share my views:
Uma
Emma
Nanopolitan
Angry fix
Gaurav Sabnis
Dev Kumar Vasudevan

Class room news

2007-03-23T21:41:00.000+05:00

Here is a peek into one of our class room presentations by someone who spends most of the time home and here is a tukda from the presentation..

Presentation topic: Harper Lee's To kill a mocking bird. (Harper lee is a Pulitzer prize winning author, just in case you didnt know.)

Time : about 12 in the afternoon.

Scene one.
Biographical details of the author and background detail of the work.

" Harper lee won the pulitzer for killing a mocking bird."

Scene two
Chapter wise detail.

After many "here in this novel" intros....

" He has been raped the white woman"
(would only be understood by people who have read To kill a mocking bird.. for the rest, the white woman accuses the black man of raping her )

Scene three
Description of a character

"Boob radley was ...."
(The character is called Boo radley)

Scene four
The pulitzer award winning sentence...

"The nigger was raped the white woman and the white woman complains that "it" had raped her.."
(The Book was completely raped..)

End notes

Nigger is a derogatory term. If I was in America and the person had given this presentation there. God Save.. Black is the term they are comfortable with. "It" raped her was .. well no comments..

To conclude.
I love my class. atleast the presentation part of it..

Termination

2007-03-16T23:27:00.001+05:00

Shapeless,
Unborn,
Unknown,
Anonymous piece of flesh
Unwanted,
Disposed,
Murdered,
Anonymous piece of flesh.

The ride to heaven

2007-03-16T23:25:00.000+05:00

On the fast lane
Vrooom!!!
The engine accelerates
The meter ticks
to the maximum
Adrenaline rush
Get the ‘kick’
Experience the high
A slow driver
passes by
laughter and ridicule
"who wears the helmet?
Old man!!!"
The wind blowing on
my silken hair
"Ohhh!!! I look damn hot!!"
A moment of pause
The tar turns red
The innards are splashed
on the road
The high hits the blue.
No more breath
No more pulse
No more no more
Eyes closed
the wayto heaven
I head.

Innovations and metaphors

2007-03-16T23:21:00.001+05:00

The bird flies high
takes my heart away
to the far off
cold beautiful land
where once the
terror ruled.
I sit in frontof a machine
typing out alphabets
that carry meanings
I wait for those signals
to sing the tone
and happily I pick
the box which
transports voices
across nations.
I can see faces
onthe screen,
smiling, laughing
,looking lovingly
into my eyes
conveying those words
unsaid, far away
where those cold
snow peaked mountains
reside.

Identity

2007-03-16T23:18:00.000+05:00

The ratcheting boom spreads
like a disease
with no vaccine
It hurts, it breeds.
Questions unanswered
decay in the open
to be
scavenged in memory.
Don't look at me
like I don't belong
I am not a refugee
And this is my land.
Don't deny me
my identity.
My land.
My space.
Never never
are the pleas heard
for they opened up
the deep underground
to scar the skies in hazy gray.
Troubled by the truth
haunted by the thoughts
for centuries suppressed
now here to see..
Oh please oh please
I ain't your battle ground.
Bury it deep down
in the abyss of the bygone
deeper than the bones
that this soil buries....

2007-03-16T22:00:00.000+05:00

The gift
of soft melting chocolates.
The sweetness melts,
deep inside.
A certain chill,
an ecstasy,
the feeling ,
of highest fulfillment,
unexplainable ,
yet - present.
the longing
for that gift
before the distance
separates.
The message floats
through gestures,
to be deciphered.
But... would the
unspoken linear words
be heard?
In the midst
of the surrounding
cacophony of thoughts,
a desire expressed.
Time runs and
yet stands still
The words stop ,
Abrupt.
Till ... time and 'time'
decide to merge
into bliss.

The festival.

2007-03-12T15:41:00.000+05:00

The air smells divine,
Fragrant agarbatthis,
Loud crackers,
The cheer in the neighbourhood,
The banging of drums,
The dance of festive joy.
Devotees rejoice.
Through the small lanes,
the crowd spreads .
The sudden smell of burnt skin,
Remains of black charred rubber
The clanging of falling pots
The cries, the shrieks
Drums beat louder
The voice drowns,
Vows written in red ink.
The dance of death.
The diety looks on
Numb, Unmoving, Silent.

2007-02-21T20:12:00.000+05:00

Faint flickering lights.
The clock strikes midnight,
She stands
on the doorway,
Dressed to kill,
Waiting for
her man to come
Red bright colour
on her forced moist lips,
Unknown smiles returned
She greets, looks eagerly
Her eyes fixed
on the tingle of paper
in the pockets
The burning stomach
The spreading thighs
An invite to pleasure
written on the
grave of her-self.

Ambition

2007-02-12T00:41:00.000+05:00

Dreams .. Are they just mine alone?
Thoughts.. they arent just mine alone
My thoughts contain the other too
but does the other contain mine?

Are my dreams a thorn
in the others path.
Do I divert?
or should I follow?
For they are mine
Long nurtured
and hoped for.

Or do my dreams
need to change?

Time will tell

But what does
it choose to tell?

My dreams that change..

would they mean a smile on my face?
would they ensure a content heart?
or would they just compromise
and fool my heart?

Was this what
I had aspired for?
Is This how
the girls mind
should behave?

Are my dreams
what the other
should achieve?

Congrats Dear.

2007-02-09T18:33:00.000+05:00

Pradyot got through ISB. I am so happy. At the same time a bit ... can't say sad or unhappy but ..Hmmmmmmm... He will be away for a year. Busy with his studies. But I am glad that he would be fulfilling his dream.
Congrats My darling.
I am so very happy today.. dont have any words to write.. HUGS..

Home Alone Diaries!!

2007-02-08T22:06:00.000+05:00

I don't have enough experience staying away from mom. Its been 2 years since mom took a holiday and went anywhere. 2 years back when mom went to visit my grand mom for a month, I had a hard time trying to do house work. Two years later things are no different. Ask me why?

I have been trying to learn household chores like cooking and washing. But I am pathetic at it. Thats why I keep saying that the guy who will marry me needs to know cooking ( thankfully he does know how to cook and wash utensils. You are saved darling) . Today I had to cook. I aint bad at that so I managed to cook and wash all the utensils. Before mom left home today morning, she reminded me that every night she boils milk and keeps it aside so that it doesnt get spoilt by morning. So the responsible kid decided to do the same. After washing all the utensils I put the gas on and kept the milk. I went on with other work that mom had asked me to do before I go to sleep and completely forgot about the milk ( now I dont do this work everyday) After half an hour, I could smell something burning. I thought someone was burning something outside. Five min's went by, then this tubelight realised that she had kept milk to boil. By the time I ran to the rescue,most of the milk had already evaporated and was burnt. In my attempt to shut the gas. I ended up spilling some of the boiling hot milk on my thumb.
Now my thumb looks all nice and ROSY. GRRRRRRRRRRr...

Mommyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy....

I am glad she is back on sunday. Guess I need to start taking those classes from her

Of deconstruction and religion and other happenings in life.

2007-02-08T14:35:00.000+05:00

Stuck with one of my papers. Trying to write it. Have an arguement but finding it so difficult to support my arguement.
Sultanmojojo is getting married today. Wish you a happy married life Sultan. I am so happy for both of you. Sorry for not being able to make it to your wedding, but I surely deserve my date at Mocha with you. :)
Been sitting in front of the computer for a long while now. My mind is so pre-occupied with so many thoughts that I aint able to focus on what to write. Just hoping that this is just a passing phase.
Have been thinking about a few idealogies that I have been introduced to by a few fanatics last few days. The whole notion of democracy and equal rights can also be biased, but I still support secularism cos I feel that secularist in a certain manner, stay away from violence which the fundamentalists propagate( This is completely my opinion) . Secularists theorise and use words to fight their battle. We do have a bias.When you state you have an opinion that means that you are biased. All opinions are biases against something,someone or some place.
When one has a counter-hegemony arguement, he/she is baised against the dominant idealogy. Every arguement is valid in its own right. The discourses that these debates create is more interesting.The problem doesnt exist in having these opinions but the problem arises when one de-bunks the counter- arguement and wants his/her idealogy to be accepted by all. The need to be the dominant and the fight against being marginalised is human.
Derrida states that a structure needs to be present to keep the society running but he also states that one cant have a single unitary structure . To ensure a "freeplay" of thoughts what is required is a structure which encompasses all the different plural structures.The fundamentalist claim for a unified, singular religion structure is problematic. At the same time a world without fundamentalists is striving for a utopia. The co-existance of unity and plurality is something that deconstruction would ask for.
Now, I know that this is quite confusing . Deconstruction is not an easy thought to digest for we have been told to strive to build a focussed unified structure. But when it comes to politics of religion, I feel that deconstruction answers my queries. Religion has never been a closed structure for it is supposed to contain the masses and the upper class.( if it really does is quite debate-able). But when religion is supposed to unite people from all castes and class. One cant claim to have a unitary single class religion. Even the fundamentalists have blurred the distinctions between lower caste gods & upper class gods ( once again a debate-able statement, but superficially the fundamentalists claim to unify people of a certain religion together). What I fail to understand is that when internally every religion tries to bind people together into an unified force, Why cant they see the same logic when it comes to accepting the other religion?

2007-02-02T22:57:00.000+05:00

Thoughts need to be contained in prose, poetry or any form but on a sheet. Or else random opinions cant be featured where my soul explores the mysteries of life around. Anonymity not allowed in this space.

Long time i wrote

2007-02-02T21:56:00.000+05:00

I have been busy with exams ( yes I had one again this month) and other things in life.Its been days since I wrote anything . Firstly I am happy that the BMP commissioner Mr Jairaj took a positive decision today at the BMP meeting.All Stray dogs wont be killed but only the aggressive and violent ones will be euthanised. Next all illegal meat shops will be closed and hygiene would be maintained by making sure that Resident associations work with BMP to keep their locality clean. I have a really big content smile on my face now.

Life has been hectic otherwise. Submissions time again in college. This time I have chosen topics that interest me. Only problem I have a writers block. Trying to get over it.

Hey by the way, Indian Ocean and Junoon playing at IIM Bangalore tomorrow. and me gonna be there. Like their music.

I have also been very vocal about my opinions. Feeling glad about it. One thing mom taught me. Always express yourself, stand up for what is right. And I would always do so. Love you Mom for making me the woman ( Independent and expressive) that I am.

Also been spammed by a Lunatic, And since I believe everyone has a right to express their opinion I have been patiently replying to those comments. The Lunatic is angry because I managed to express my opinion and the lunatic doesnt believe in it. I could have said my blog, my thoughts, buzz off. But I think this is a good way to brush up my debating skills. and as sunshine says, "Listen to opinions but dont agree to everything you listen". I am listening but aint changing my views.

Protest against killing Stray dogs.

2007-01-31T22:02:00.001+05:00

Forwarded Message..

Dear Animal lovers,

I just recd. SMS from ARF - reads as follows:

Dog-haters are meeting BMP Commissioner and asking for:
1. Killing all stray dogs
2. Removing the vocal cords of pet dogs to stop barking.

ANIMAL LOVERS ARE PROTESTING AGAINST THEIR MOVE AND HAVE CALLED FOR ALL TO PARTICIPATE. PLS ASSEMBLE AT MAYO HALL - 2.45 P.M. ON 02-02-2007 to show our strength and protest

R.S.V.P - Shoba 9886138311

Pls confirm with Shoba before attending.

Pls attend & get many people to attend - You could also help ARF in posters, press release, etc.
- Brindha

Liberation!!!!!!!!

2007-01-19T22:25:00.000+05:00

My frustrations just increase
I, The liberated woman
but Am I?
I fear, I fear
of acid attacks
of those invisible threats
and my scars
short text messages
vowing eternal friendships
I ignore, I ignore
But does that stop?
No, For i cant refuse
how dare I refuse
I, dare not speak
of those slimy hands
tracing my contours
For who am I
but just a woman.
How can i fight?
Should I dare?
I dare, I dare
for my voice
cant be stifled.
I Roar.
My voice booms
the warning
should be heard
Dont turn deaf,
HEAR MY VOICE
YOU BETTER..
LISTEN

Jobless!!!!!!!!

2007-01-14T12:34:00.000+05:00

As there wasn't anything better to do, We ( Myself and Pradyot) picked this meme. Follow the ones in bold..
01. Bought everyone in the pub a drink
02. Swam with wild dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula.
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said ‘I love you’ and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Done a striptease
1 1. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Stayed up all night long, and watch the sun rise
15. Seen the Northern Lights
16. Gone to a huge sports game
17. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
18. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
19. Touched an iceberg
20. Slept under the stars
21. Changed a baby’s diaper
22. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
23. Watched a meteor shower
24. Gotten drunk on champagne
25. Given more than you can afford to charity
26. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
27. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
28. Had a food fight
29. Bet on a winning horse
30. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
31. Asked out a stranger
32. Had a snowball fight
33. Photocopied your bottom on the office photocopier
34. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
35. Held a lamb
36. Enacted a favorite fantasy
37. Taken a midnight skinny dip
38. Taken an ice cold bath
39. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar
40. Seen a total eclipse
41. Ridden a roller coaster
42. Hit a home run
43. Fit three weeks miraculously into three days
44. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
45. Adopted an accent for an entire day
46. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
47. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
48. Had two hard drives for your computer
49. Visited all states
50. Loved your job for all accounts
51. Taken care of someone who was shit faced
52. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
53. Had amazing friends
54. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
55. Watched wild whales
56. Stolen a sign
57. Backpacked in Europe
58. Taken a road-trip
59. Rock climbing
60. Lied to foreign government’s official in that country to avoid notice
61. Midnight walk on the beach
62. Sky diving
63. Visited Ireland
64. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
65. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
66. Visited Japan
67. Benchpressed your own weight
68. Milked a cow
69. Alphabetized your records
70. Pretended to be a superhero
71. Sung karaoke
72. Lounged around in bed all day
73. Posed nude in front of strangers
74. Scuba diving
75. Got it on to “Let’s Get It On” by Marvin Gaye
76. Kissed in the rain
77. Played in the mud
78. Played in the rain
79. Gone to a drive-in theater
80. Done something you should regret, but don’t regret it
81. Visited the Great Wall of China
82. Discovered that someone who’s not supposed to have known about your blog has discovered your blog
83. Dropped Windows in favor of something better
84. Started a business
85. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
86. Toured ancient sites
87. Taken a martial arts class
88. Swordfought for the honor of a woman
89. Played Counter-Strike for more than 6 hours straight
90. Gotten married
91. Been in a movie
92. Crashed a party
93. Loved someone you shouldn’t have
94. Kissed someone so passionately it made them dizzy
95. Gotten divorced
96. Had sex at the office
97. Gone without food for 5 days
98. Made cookies from scratch
99. Won first prize in a costume contest
100. Ridden a gondola in Venice
101. Gotten a tattoo
102. Found that the texture of some materials can turn you on
103. Rafted the Snake River
104. Been on television news programs as an “expert”
105. Got flowers for no reason
106. Masturbated in a public place
107. Got so drunk you don’t remember anything
108. Been addicted to some form of illegal drug
109. Performed on stage
110. Been to Las Vegas
111. Recorded music
112. Eaten shark
113. Had a one-night stand
114. Gone to Thailand
115. Seen Siouxsie live
116. Bought a house
117. Been in a combat zone
118. Buried one/both of your parents
119. Shaved or waxed your pubic hair off
120. Been on a cruise ship
121. Spoken more than one language fluently
122. Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone
123. Bounced a check
124. Performed in Rocky Horror
125. Read - and understood - your credit report
126. Raised children
127. Recently bought and played with a favorite childhood toy
128. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
129. Created and named your own constellation of stars
130. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
131. Found out something significant that your ancestors did (discover fire, invent the wheel etc etc) -
132. Called or written your Congress person
133. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
134. …more than once? - More than thrice?
135. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
136. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
137. Had an abortion or your female partner did
138. Had plastic surgery
139. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
140. Wrote articles for a large publication
141. Lost over 100 pounds
142. Held someone while they were having a seizure
143. Piloted an airplane
144. Petted a stingray
145. Broken someone’s heart
146. Helped an animal give birth
147. Been fired or laid off from a job
148. Won money on a T.V. game show
149. Broken a bone150. Killed a human being
151. Gone on an African photo safari
152. Ridden a motorcycle
153. Driven any land vehicle at a speed of greater than 100mph
154. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
155. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
156. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
157. Ridden a horse
158. Had major surgery
159. Had sex on a moving train
160. Had a snake as a pet
161. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
162. Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing
163. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
164. Visited more foreign countries than Indian states
165. Visited all 7 continents
166. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
167. Eaten kangaroo meat
168. Fallen in love at an ancient Mayan burial ground
169. Been a sperm or egg donor
170. Eaten sushi
171. Had your picture in the newspaper
172. Had 2 (or more) healthy romantic relationships for over a year in your lifetime
173. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
174. Gotten someone fired for their actions
175. Gone back to school
176. Parasailed
177. Changed your name
178. Petted a cockroach
179. Eaten fried green tomatoes
180. Read The Iliad
181. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
182. Dined in a restaurant and stolen silverware, plates, cups because your apartment needed them
183. …and gotten 86′ed from the restaurant because you did it so many times, they figured out it was you
184. Taught yourself an art from scratch
185. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
186. Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt
187. Skipped all your school reunions
188. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
189. Been elected to public office
190. Written your own computer language
191. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
192. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
193. Built your own PC from parts
194. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
195. Had a booth at a street fair
196: Dyed your hair
197: Been a DJ/RJ
198: Found out someone was going to dump you via LiveJournal
199: Written your own role playing game
200: Been arrested

A blissful year

2007-01-10T22:37:00.000+05:00

This has got nothing to do with the New Year. Neither am I going to wish you all a Happy new year. The years gonna be another exciting year where each one of you will smile and cry and laugh and do all mentionables and non-mentionables too.

Eggjactly a year back I got a comment on my blog that someones steel cold heart was warmed to visit the blog of another Animal lover , Little did he know that his steel cold heart will be more joyous and content in just a years time. He didnt realise that the friendship that he was going to start building that day, in a year would end up getting him addicted to the same animal lover for all his life. Neither did I dream that in a years time I would be writing this on my blog.

My Darling Sonnenschien,
I am glad I met you a year back, I am glad that in this one year I have not only been able to build a wonderful friendship, at the same time also realised that Love knocks at your door when you least expect it . Life with you is just beautiful. I am just hoping that 25 years from now. I can still say the same things about us, look back at these beautiful pages and have that content smile.

Love you..

2007-01-07T13:49:00.000+05:00

Deeps wrote this about his relationship a year back.

"She knows that I am not perfect..and that I love the fact that she's not perfect too!Yet, we are perfect for each other at every moment in time because we also know that 'not being perfect' isn't an excuse to never try to be better!!We know that romance is not an accident...It is an act of intent!We know that our relation does not automatically sustain itself....it needs persistent care and concern...like a work of art..it needs a dream, a vision, a hope; it needs our skill and our intellect, it needs our passion and emotion, it needs the ability to find completeness in each other!We know that opinions and ideologies dont matter..However doing what needs to be done best for both of us, does matter!We know that our love is just our own world...a world that only has two people..me and her! The world outside is where we live in ...the world we live with...And OUR world is the world where we have no secrets, no need to prove a point, no need to live in the past.. ..it is a world where we rejoice in the daily discovery of each other, of knowing that there is a million ways to discovering each other, knowing that we are making the world around a better place...one step at a time, together!"

He has been married for 4 months now. And after being in a relationship for nearly a year now. I realise how much of what is said is true

People always keep searching for THE one. I agree that you need to have something similar or some chemistry to fall in love ,at the same time I feel that what really matters is that you put in the effort to know the person and appreciate the other person for what he or she is.

In these few months of being together I have realised that both of us are not perfect. We have our own flaws and arguements. We are so different but still our love for each other just grows for we dont want each other to change. I fell in love with him for the ambivert that he was and for all the intellect and love that he could share with me. And he fell in love cos I would not let worries bother me too much and live life to the fullest.

Opposites attract but they can only stay together if the right amount of effort is put into the relationship. Or else the attraction just fades away when a new magnet just passes by us.

2007-01-03T22:57:00.002+05:00

There are a few songs which just make me cry whenever I listen to them.

1) David Gray: Sail Away:
Its a beautiful romantic number, Everytime this song is played at home. The river just flows. A quiet thought just crosses my mind, that never in my life should I be away from the one I love. Not even for a minute. But thats just hoping for too much aint it?

2) R.E.M: Losing my religion:
Infatuated? Not at all , But madly in love. That I surely am.

3) Pearl Jam: Last Kiss:
Never ever want to be in a situation like the one that the song describes. Guess I wont ever be able to take it. One of those songs that just touched my heart the very first minute I heard it and makes me cry everytime I listen to it.

Wondering why am I writing this post?

Well!!!.. I just listened to these songs now. And it took me some time to get back to this world and console myself that everything is alright and life is so beautiful around me right now...

Touchwood!!!!!!!

My little christmas tree!!!

2006-12-25T09:37:00.000+05:00

Merry Christmas!!!!

2006-12-24T12:49:00.000+05:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL OF YOU!!!!

I just love plum cakes!!So make sure you gift me plum cakes this season..

Clot

2006-12-21T21:16:00.000+05:00

A crust
of dried blood,
Dust mixed.
A rusted knife,
Wounding
the skin.
The liquid
gushes out again
Clot formed
Un-healed
For the knife
strikes....
Again..

The Voice box throttled

2006-12-08T19:10:00.000+05:00

The voice box throttled
Gasp!!!!! choke!!!
The sound
doesnt reach.
The shouts
silenced.
The reasons
chanted.
The chants boom
louder and louder.
It spins
and dances
like the spirits
around the
scarred remains
of a mum doll.

Waiting..

2006-12-06T21:27:00.000+05:00

I hate people who dont value my time. I was out today on field work conducting a survey for my Indian literature class. We are going to read a few writers who wrote about working women and the problems they face juggling both work and home. So our lecturer Ameeta ma'm asked us to talk to 5 men whose wife works and 5 working women and get their viewpoints about working women.After collecting info from an attender in my college,a florist, a lecturer, I called one of my friends who works for a media house. I asked him if I could talk to a few of his colleagues if they were ok with it. I met a few people and then my friend said I could also talk to the BIG boss( I am not giving out the designation for I dont want my friend to lose his job) who was there and that he had already talked to him about the survey.THE BIG boss had said he would talk to me after a while since he was busy right then. So the wait started.. I waited for 1 hour and then the boss just went home without even meeting me.Like an idiot I waited for an hour when I might have as well done my research elsewhere. Bloss tried to reason with me that the person was the Big boss and he would not have the time to meet students like us.Whatever be the reason, I refuse to accept that any person should actually keep one waiting and not meet and leave just like that. I would have been happy if the person would have just walked towards me and said he could not have possibly spoken to me that day and maybe I could talk to him later. All I would say is just because I am a student doesnt mean I dont have other "important" things to do.

2006-11-29T21:45:00.000+05:00

A single
blade of grass,
standing tall
in the vast dry lands
drought hit
clouds decieve
parched ,
a drop falls...
thirst quenched?

For all software and hardware friends around.

2006-11-27T12:56:00.000+05:00

Yella Software hardware engineer baandhavarige, Naanu arpithisthene eee kavana.. If u guys decide to disown me later, kindly think twice, cos I am the only one who listens to all your PJs and dont get angry when you guys are busy and out of town..
This poem is specially dedicated to Deeps and MSP who have been working 18-22 hours everyday in Canada and US of A. Nimagaagi nannakadeindha ee putta kaanike.. Odhiri, Enjoy maadiri..

Kaththegalu saar kaththegalu
benmele load thagolde iru kathegalu
thale yella kedskalo kaththegalu
computer nodi,
formula bareyuva kaththegalu
distinction pass,university top kaththgalu
Maneli Grrrr yennuva kaththegalu
aadhre boss yedharugade
meow annuva kaththegalu
Kaththeeeeeeeeeeeeegalu
SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR
Kaththegaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllllluuuuuuu..

He he he... But whatever I say.. You guys really need an applause for working like that.. take care...

2006-11-22T21:32:00.000+05:00

Tic Tock
chimes the clock.
Reminder of the
age old ritual
that I once
denied to acknowledge
A faint,
forgotten lore
rings in my ears.
Unknown,
a thought
visits,scars
my heart
And I once again
aghast, lone
try to fight
these tears
that remind me
of all that was
"forgotten"

The Book quiz.

2006-11-17T01:05:00.000+05:00

You're Catch-22!

by Joseph Heller

Incredibly witty and funny, you have a taste for irony in all that you
see. It seems that life has put you in perpetually untenable situations, and your sense
of humor is all that gets you through them. These experiences have also made you an
ardent pacifist, though you present your message with tongue sewn into cheek. You
could coin a phrase that replaces the word "paradox" for millions of
people.

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

HAR HAR HAR HAR!!!!!!!!!!!

Bored!!!!!!!!

2006-11-17T00:11:00.000+05:00

Not even a week and I am already bored of doing nothing.. Exams got over egjacktly 5 days ago and after that I have been doing nothing but putting on weight. Two of my darlings aint in town. Sunshine is in Malaysia and Deeps in Canada. Absolut Iyer is busy with work. By the way if you guys happen to see the new Fitnessone ads with the lady in red tying her shoes. Thats done by the Iyer himself. (You owe me a coffee monkey. free advertising for you here..he he he. ..just joking).
I went book shopping.(de bangalore book festival). Found nothing much there. Whatever I asked for, they told me it was available in their main branch. Then why be a part of the festival? Was happy to find Germaine Greer's "The Female Eunuch" though ( Select stall, you need to search but there are quite a few second hand books which are rare ). Was searching for that book for a long time now. By the way if anyone can tell me where in Bangalore can I find Bernard Malamud's ( The German refugee, Idiots first) , Raymond Carver's( Cathedral) and William Faulkner's (A rose for emily) short stories , I would be glad to know. Our very own Bangalore university has prescribed a few short stories which are not easily available. I searched all book stores around MG road Majestic and Koramangala but I couldnt find them. I would not mind getting the whole collection of their short stories given these stories are present. If any of you have those stories then please can I make a copy and return the book to you??. Also searching for english translations of Kambara's "Siri Sampige" and Rajender Kaur's "Ek chader maili si".
Thats all thats happening in little Shubhs world (as Sunshine calls it).. More updates as and when I am bored.. Till then,Take care all of you

2006-11-14T00:25:00.000+05:00

And the child in me
runs through
the green green grass.
Feels the morning mist,
kiss my cheeks.
Laughter innocent
my friend.
Soul untouched ,
un- corrupt,
Pure...

HAPPY CHILDRENS DAY.

Eggjam Aithu

2006-11-12T13:09:00.000+05:00

Yeah!!! Eggjam aithu.. Full maja masti.. Ayyo yelli.. HaaL next semester aagle Kaadtha idhe.. Book shopping, Research material hunting Shuru aithu.. Hmmm
Guess I aint gonna be going out anywhere.The only form of entertainment right now is reading books.. and of course catching up with a few friends and relatives (who keep asking if I am the prime minister that i dont have half hour to meet them.) So Shubhs gonna visit all her relatives and meet her friends.

And blogging will continue.. also the radio shows go on as usual, Tuesday evenings (between 6 and 7pm and 9 and 11 pm) and maybe Wednesday afternoons too( will keep u posted about this) So all you guys who say you dont have radio's and I need to gift you radio's to listen to your show. You better get that 100 rupee radio and tune in.. ( If you say you cant then all I will say is "Abey Kanjoos Makkhi choos").

Today Shubhs is gonna celebrate 125 years of existence of St Josephs college. So here she disappears.... Whooooooooooooossssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhh....

Thank You Anonymous

2006-11-09T14:38:00.000+05:00

A big thank you to anonymous.. Who ever you are, thanks for letting us know about the Emu's kept in a house in Banashankari.. Mr Shanthakumar our Animal Welfare officern(cruelty) did visit the house.We were able to get the owner to agree to get the necessary documents and breed the Emu's at his farmhouse. Emu's are considered as farm animals and can be owned , provided one obtains permission from the Agriculture dept and there is enough space for them at home.

If you find any animal in need, feel free to leave a comment or email me at soultrot@yahoo.com. Kindly leave your name and telephone number to help us do our job better..

2006-11-04T18:10:00.001+05:00

Dear Blog, ( Naah )Dear computer,
As I stare at your beautiful(ahem!!!! bright) screen I am reminded that I must be studying ( then what the hell am I doing here!!!!!!!!!). Well I finished writing my first exam ....my first paper for third sem MA English Final exams( what the hell are you doing here then!!!!!!) I wrote it pretty fine, but the paper was lengthy. Iam bugged. Came back home at around 1.30 and have been watching TV since then, Watched a game of basketball then moved on to a quiz on Australia channel, watched Tom and Jerry,Some scenes of the following movies: Dum dum dum in Tamil, Pretty woman, Socha na tha, Some Govinda and Sushmita sen movie,some scary movie starring Aftab Shivdasani, Esha Deol, Sanjay Kapoor(this guy still is a part of bollywood????) and Jaya Bachchan. Also watched Lola Kutty and the Beegees, And a few songs on MTV and Channel V. Mom asked me to handover the remote to her so that she can watch some sobby saturday evening Tara starring kannada movie,and so I had to resort to looking at your face. I am bored to death and have no mood to start studying Post colonial theory today. Its been raining for past 3 hours now and I got completely drenched when myself and Kid went out for a walk. Now I will keep staring at your face and writing this piece of useless writing and publish it too.
Thank You for listening
Love
Your down with exam fever
Shubhs.

The difficulties of attending Anonymous calls to save animals.

2006-11-03T19:51:00.000+05:00

Today I got an anonymous comment on the blog stating that there were 2 ostriches being kept in the backyard of a house in Banashankari. I was asked to "save them" and I promptly informed CUPA officers. But what I sincerely request each one of you is to kindly leave your name and telephone number when you leave such comments. Mr Anonymous left me a note in the afternoon stating that its too bad that we insist on knowing the persons name and telephone number. What he/she failed to understand is that we get hundreds of crank calls stating that an animal is in trouble and we need to save them. Many a times we go to the place only to figure out that there was no animal there. Though CUPA has the right to save animals in distress. It cant barge in to every citizens home in order to save animals ( we can also be sued, if an animal is not found as claimed). We expect the informers to give us proper information as responsible citizens. People need to understand that CUPA shelter is situated in Hebbal and there is only one ambulance which covers the whole city. The possiblility of missing the chance to help a needy animal when we go about attending anonymous hoax calls makes it necessary to take down the informers details. In no circumstances the person who informs us about the cruelty against the animal would be harrased. Your details will not be shared with any one. Moreover CUPA takes your number in order to know the exact location and the condition of the animal. Once the animal is in their care , they would not trouble you further.Hence I request you all to kindly leave your name and telephone number to help us do our job better. If you fear that the comment section in the blog is open for public viewing you can feel free to email me @ soultrot@yahoo.com.

2006-11-02T17:07:00.000+05:00

Salty, drops of water,
trickling down
the smooth surface
of skin.
Reasons not known
yet they trickle down.
the beating is low
and the mind restless.
Reason unknown
yet affected
by this unknown storm

The Hindutva project of saffronising Bababudangiri

2006-11-01T13:40:00.000+05:00

The picturesque Bababudangiri hills are situated in Chickmagalur district of Karnataka. The Bababudangiri shrine has been in focus for the past few decades because of the communal tensions between Hindus and Muslims. There are many legends and myths circulating about the shrine. The Hindutva claims that the shrine belongs to the Hindus, for it is the place where the hindu ascetic god “Dattatreya” was “born”. The Muslims claim that , Bababudan ,a Sufi saint meditated in the caves of Budangiri about 1500 years ago. For centuries, Bababudangiri has been the symbol of true secularism and syncreticism.Both Hindus and Muslims have been worshiping Bababudan without any religious conflict. However from the past 2 decades, Hindutva forces have been trying to saffronise this secular space for their own political gains. The Hindutva forces dream of creating a Hindu India and syncretic spaces like Bababudangri , have been an obstacle in the path of “making India hindu”. Hindutva forces create an image of India as a goddess to be saved from the clutches of the Muslims and go back to the glorious Hindu past. The Sangh parivar claim Bababudangiri to be the birthplace of Dattatreya which was usurped by the Muslims. The Sangh Parivar calls for “the fellow Hindu warriors” to save their holy place and restore the “lost”land..This paper tries to put forth the different narratives and myths circulating about Bababudangiri and analyzes how questions of caste have been silenced and gender is foregrounded by the Hindutva in order to saffronise the syncretic shrine of Bababudangiri. The process of saffronisation is done by circulating false stories drawn from the different myths about Bababudan and Dattatreya .

The Shrine and the Rituals practiced .
The Shrine of Bababudangiri consists of four tombs of the disciples of Bababudan, the seat of Bababudan, the paduka, the nandadeepa and the spring of holy water. To the left of the seat one finds a tunnel which is believed to be the tunnel to mecca. To the left of the cave we find the chilla of Mama Jigni or Anusuya1 The Sajjad-e-nishan, the administrative and the religious head of the shrine is believed to be the descendant of Bababudan.The religious rituals of the shrine are conducted by the Mujavar, who is appointed by the Sajjad-e-nishan.The rituals combine both Hindu and Islamic traditions. The prayer that is chanted by the Mujavar traces the lineage of the Bababudan. There is a place where both Hindu and Muslims break coconuts2 for the fulfillment of their wishes. The Mujavar, though part of the Islamic tradition wears a saffron turban instead of a green turban.

The Myth of Dattatreya and Anusuya
There are no exact authentic written histories about Bababudan or Dattatreya. Dattatreya is considered as the reincarnation of the hindu trinity ,Brahma, Vishnu and Maheshwara.(Shiva). The Puranic tradition claims that he was the reincarnation of Vishnu. The believers of Nath3 tradition believe him to be the incarnation of Shiva4. There are many different myths surrounding the birth of Dattatreya. Though the Markandeya purana 5 and the
Brahma purana6 The Natha tradition 7 believe that Dattatreya was born to sage Atri and Anusuya,8 there are different narratives about the reasons behind the birth of Dattatreya and the number of brothers and sisters dattatreya had9.According to the Mahabharata, Dattatreya belonged to the lineage of the sage Atri and was not the son of sage Atri and Anusuya. There are many more myths circulating about Dattatreya's youth. The Markandeya Purana reports that Dattatreya let go of all his brahminical ascetic roots and lived a worldly life. 10 “The Bhagavata Purana varies in its description of Dattatreya. In a few parts he is portrayed as an ascetic while in others he is the demon.11 From the descriptions of Dattatreya drawn from the different narratives,we can assume that Dattatreya was a non vedic figure, who let go of his brahmanical roots and rebelled against it. It is believed that Anusuya the mother of Dattatreya also meditated in the hills of Bababudan. There are also stories about Anusuya having the power to make chapatis out of the soil from the cave. One of the narratives also states that a Fakir once tried to molest Anusuya and she was rescued by Dattatreya.

The Myth of Bababudan and Mama Jigni
Sufism is supposed to be the mystical aspect of Islam12 Sufism like the Bhakti poets in India was an anti class/caste movement. It broke the barriers of caste and was greatly followed by the poor and the lower class section of the society. Bababudan who was the disciple of Hazrath Dada Hayath Meer Khalandar belonged to the Sufi sect. It is also believed that Bababudan was the first one to bring coffee seeds to Chickmagalur13 The Shahkhadri 14 and the Islamic wing15 of the Karnataka Komu Souharda vedike give different narratives about the origin of Bababudan and the history of the Bababudan hills. Mama Jigni is believed to be the adopted daughter of Bababudan, People believe that Mama Jigni had mystical powers to convert soil into bread . Like the tale of Anusuya, it is also believed that a wandering Fakir once tried to molest Mama Jigni and she was saved by Bababudan.Though there are no written documents to support the stories about Bababudan or Jamal Magribi, We do find documents pertaining to the administrative rights of the Sajjad-e-nishaan 16 These documents prove that administrative duties of shrine were fulfilled by the Sajjad-e-nishaan for centuries.

The Hindutva Myth of Bababudangiri
The Sangh Parivar has always been aiming at creating a Hindu India. The violence in Gujrat and Ayodhya have been the battlegrounds of the militant “hindu India” project of the Hindutva forces.The Sangh Parivar draws on the story of Dattatreya to claim the Budangiri shrine as hindu. The Muslims have always been stereotyped by the sangh parivar as overtly sexual and violent beings. They have been constructed as the 'other' who invaded India and plundered its riches. Hindutva creates the figure of Mother India being molested by the Muslim invaders. Using this figure of helpless pious woman. Hindutva forces mobilize people to come forth and save the honour of the mother nation. In a syncretic space like Bababudangiri, the Hindutva forces manipulated the myth of molestation of Anusuya. Anusuya in the religious myths is a pious woman who is known for her devotion towards her husband. Anusuya's devotion towards her husband results in the birth of Dattatreya who is none other than the reincarnation of Vishnu. Thus Anusuya is the figure of an ideal hindu woman.By focusing on the story of molestation of Anusuya, Hindutva forces create an emasculated figure of the Hindu man as against the overtly sexual figure of the Muslim male. The hindu man is urged to appropriate the characteristics of the 'other' (i.e the muslim) and resort to violence in order to achieve the dream of an ideal Hindu state. Anusuya becomes the stereotypical image of a helpless and innocent woman who has to be protected from the “libidinous” muslim man.
The choice of the figure of Dattatreya by the Hindutva for their campaign is an interesting point to explore. Dattatreya was an ascetic. Ascetics were expected to be peace loving and tolerant. This image of the ascetic fits perfectly into the hindutva image of the hindu as a tolerant man, who has been open hearted and accommodative towards the muslims. The image of the ascetic hindu is placed in contrast with the demonic muslim.The hindutva forces manipulate the image of Dattatreya in order to mobilize people against Bababudan and thus saffronising a syncretic space. Colonialism created the notion of a homogenised brahmin India17. This homogenisation silenced the different religious practices of various sects of hinduism in India. The ideology of brahmin India still continues in the hindutva discourses today. In the Bababudangiri discourse one can see that the image of Dattatreya has been altered to portray him as the brahmanical hindu god. The irony lies in the fact that even in the Puranas, Dattatreya is known to be anti-brahmanical and anti-caste. Yet the photographs of dattatreya distributed by the hindutva forces show him wearing the sacred thread.
Dattatreya in the Puranic tradition and Natha tradition was a wanderer, a saint who did not believe in caste barriers or performed the brahmanical rituals18 . The Hindutva forces transformed the saint figure of Dattatreya into the God figure and introduced rituals like the Datta Mala and the Shobha Yatra. The practice of animal sacrifice which was a part of the annual Urs celebration has been stopped for it doesnt fit into the hindu brahmanical practice of ahimsa.
The Sangh Parivar silences the Sufi tradition of Bababudangiri and presents it as a Muslim shrine. The Hindutva also distorts the facts of the 1975 court case19 which was filed by hindu devotee's of the shrine to prevent the shrine from being a part of the WAKF20 board. But the Hindutva forces manipulate the facts of the case and claim that the 1975 case was against the islamisation of a hindu shrine. The misrepresentation of a sufi shrine as a muslim shrine proves beneficial to the hindutva forces to silence the secular stance of sufism and gives it a muslim fundamental twist. The hindutva forces claim that the muslim fakirs took over the hindu shrine and support their argument by pointing out at the presence of the Paduka and the Nandadeepa. The paduka though seen as the footwear of an hindu ascetic can also be worn by a muslim saint. And the nandadeepa can also be used as a means to light up the cave. The hindutva argues on the basis of baseless grounds to claim that hindu root of the shrine. The Sangh parivar has also changed the name of the place from Bababudangiri to Inam Dattatreya peetha21 This has been achieved by forcibly blackening the direction plates and changing them to Inam Datta peetha.

The different oral narratives of Bababudangiri
The Hindutva narrative of Bababudangiri has been assimilated by the common man of Chikmagalur. The hindutva has been successful in creating a divide between the Hindus and Muslims of Chickmagalur. The oral narratives of the residents of Chickmagalur clearly indicate the increasing tension between people of both communities. Most of the Hindu residents assert that the shrine is a hindu temple and silence the presence of the tombs of Bababudan's disciples. The image of the Hindu god and the ritual of Datta-mala and Shobha-yatra has gained importance over the annual Urs celebration. The hindutva forces also create the fear of the muslim in the minds of Hindus by spreading rumours of women being raped22 The Hindutva forces quote examples from the muslim jihad to ask Hindus to stay united23. The hindutva forces borrow from the very religion they oppose and propagate hindu ideals. False stories are spread about the shrine. People are told that the tombs are filled with weapons like knives and choppers and any hindu devotee visiting the shrine would be killed and drowned in the spring of holy water. The muslim residents maintain the Islamic and Sufi roots but also state that devotees of both communities worship in the shrine.

Conclusion
The syncretic space of Bababudangiri has been saffronised by the hindutva forces. The saffronisation is mobilized by foregrounding the myth of the molestation of Anusuya and silencing the anti brahmanical stance of both sufism and Natha tradition of Dattatreya. A brahmin heritage is created by evoking the figure of Dattatreya as god than that of an anti-brahmanical wandering ascetic. The Hindus minds are poisoned against their muslim neighbours by creating a demonic, overtly sexual image. The hindu men are “awakened” by emasculating them and also evoking the image of the helpless innocent “goddess” who is being physically assaulted by the muslim other. The men are forced to appropriate the stereotype of the other (i.e the Muslims) in order to protect the hindu nation and hindu mother. The hindutva narrative draws on the different myths of Bababudangiri and Dattatreya but also succeeds in creating another pro hindu myth by manipulating gender and caste.

References:
1The Muslims believe that it was the place where Mama Jigni, the adopted daughter of Bababudan meditated where as the Hindus believe that Anusuya, Dattatreya's mother meditated there.
2This ritual was started by the Wodeyars and is practiced by both Hindus and Muslims.
3 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nath accessed on Oct 12 2006
4 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dattatreya accessed on Oct 12 2006
5 http://www.avatara.org/dattatreya/story.html accessed on Oct 14.2006.
6 Sage Atri asked for 3 sons and one daughter to the trinity and hence Chandra, Dattatreya, Durvas and Shubhatreyi were born.
7Ibid.
“A brahmin named Kaushik was staying in a town called Pratishthaan. He used to go to a whore inspite of being a Brahmin and having a devoted wife. Later he suffered from leprosy and was thrown out by the whore. Then he came back to his wife who accepted him still. However, he still did not care for the wife, and was thinking about the whore all the time. One day he asked his wife to take him to that whore. In that town, the sage Mandavya had been spiked instead of areal thief and he was lying on the spike in the forest. While walking through the deep forest in the night, Kaushik happened to hit his leg by mistake to Mandavya sage who cursed him to death before the sunrise. To stop the curse, Kaushik's wife with her powers stopped the sunrise which created havoc. The gods then went to Brahma who in turn went to Anusuya and asked her to convince Kaushik's wife to allow the sunrise. She convinced Kaushik's wife and brought back Kaushik to life after the sunrise. Gods were very happy with Anusuya and she had the trio born to her.” Another myth states that “Rahu had masked the Sun and whole Earth was in the dark. Atri released the Sun out of Rahu's hands and lighted the Earth. The gods were happy and Shiva and Vishnu were born as Durvas and Dattatreya to Atri-Anusuya. Sage Narada praised Anusuya very much which made the wives of Brahma-Vishnu-Shiva jealous of Anusuya. They requested their husbands to go and break her "pativrata" vrata They went to Anusuya as guests when Atri was not there at home and asked her to serve them (lunch) without wearing clothes. She agreed and by meditating on her her husband, put water on them, converting them into 3 babies. The three goddesses who were waiting for their husbands to come back arrived at the scene to find their husbands being converted to babies. They repented and Anusuya asked the three Gods to be born as her 3 sons."
8 http://www.indiasite.com/madhyapradesh/chitrakoot/satianusuyatemple.html accessed on Oct 14.2006.
Anusuya and Atri are believed to have been residing in chitrakoota when Brahma Vishnu and Shiva visited them. There is a temple in Chitrakoot. Madhyapradesh where sati anusuya is worshiped.
9 Ibid
One legend states that Atri meditated on the riksha kulaparvat (kula mountain) and impressed the Trinity. The Trinity granted him a boon and Atri asked them to be his children (or have children like them). So Atri and Anusuya had 3 sons namely, Soma or Chandra (the Moon) from Brahma, Dattatreya from Vishnu and sage Durvasa from Shiva.
10 http://www.experiencefestival.com/a/Dattatreya/id/457664 accessed on Oct 14.2006.
Dattatreya, to free himself of all attachments, dove into a lake where he stayed for many years by doing so, he also hoped to evade an assembly of Munis who remained on the banks of the lake awaiting his return. Datta emerged from the water naked in the company of a beautiful woman. The text relates that he made love with her (maithuna), drank liquor, and enjoyed singing and music. In spite of this, the Munis did not abandon him, and Dattatraya, accompanied by his shakti, continued to engage in these practices and was meditated on by those longing for moksha.”
11Ibid
Dattatreya enumerates a list of his twenty-four gurus: earth, air, sky / ether, water, fire, sun, moon, python, pigeons, sea, moth, bee, bull elephant, bear, deer, fish, osprey, a child, a maiden, a courtesan, a blacksmith, serpent, spider, and wasp. The image of the Natha ranged from that of a siddha living in the woods with animals, to that of a frightening, even demonic, being.”
12 Research indicates that the origin of Sufism cannot be traced back to a single definite cause; different theories have been presented that highlight the roles of expanding the mystic ideas in Qur’an by various means, the synthesis of Persian civilization with Islam, and incorporating ideas and practices of other mystic systems such as Hinduism, Buddhism and Gnosticism in formation of Sufi tradition. The evidences in support of these theories include the existence of considerable similarities between Sufism and cultures and doctrines predating and outside Islam.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_Sufism accessed onOct 14.2006
13The Islamic wing of the Karnataka Koma Souharda Vedike in Chickmagalur believe that Bababudan brought in coffee seeds from Baghdad . Chickmagalur is still famous for Arabica brand of coffee.
14The Shahkhadri states that in the 14th century, One of the Sahabi's of Prophet Mohammad Sheikh Abdul Azeez Makkhi alias Dada Hayath Meer Khalandar came to Chickmagalur and preached Islam. He went back after some time and the other members of his family, Jamal Magribi came to Chickmagalur and meditated in the hills of Bababudan giri. He also stated that sayyad Budan shah Khadri was one of the family members but he did not meditate in the Budan giri hills. One is not sure why the hills got the name Bababudangiri.
15The Islamic wing states that a sufi saint came to Chickmagalur and propagated sufism . Jamal-Shah-Khadri and his brother Musa-Hussain-Shah-Khadri brought coffee seeds from Baghdad to India Ballal Raja gave Jaagra or Inam land to them.where they sowed coffee seeds. Bababudan's four disciples meditated along with him in the cave and hence their tombs are also a part of the shrine. Mama Jigni was the adopted daughter of Bababudan.
16 The Mysore Muzrai Manual 1934, Chapter XI Mohammadan Institutions.
Mysore Archaeological report . University of Mysore. Government press. 1932.
Mysore Gazetteer Vol.V. C.Hayavadana.Rao. 1930.
Proceedings of the Mysore Representative Assembly, Government Branch Press. October 1927.
Supplement to the Mysore Gazette, October 7, 1913.21
Chapter VIII-Miscellaneous, Mysore Administration Report, 1926-27.
Rice Lewis. Epigraphic Carnatic, Vol VI, 1901.
Elliot.H.Robert, Coffee planting in Mysore. 1895.
17 http://www.proxsa.org/politics/hindutva/rampun1.html accessed on Oct 15.2006
"Hindus" and "Hinduism" are orientalist constructions originating with late eighteenth century British administrators who believed "the essence of India existed in a number of key Hindu classical scriptures such as Vedas, the codes of Manu and the shastras that often prescribe hierarchical ideas" -- a conclusion eagerly "supported and elaborated by Brahmins". (2) Britishers not only absorbed this understanding, they put an official seal on it "by applying a legal system based on Brahminic norms to all non-Muslim castes and outcastes, the British created an entirely new Brahmin legitimacy. They further validated Brahmin authority by employing, almost exclusively, Brahmins as their clerks and assistants. "(3) " -- this fabrication through repetition of India as unitary Hindu society has -- obscured the reality of a segmented society, with Brahmins and other upper castes exercising a monopoly of power, fabricated Hinduism is found everywhere." (4)
18 http://www.dlshq.org/saints/glosaint.htm accessed on Oct 15.2006
19 http://www.pucl.org/reports/Karnataka/chikamagalur.htm accessed on Oct 15.2006
“The then caretaker of the Dargah, Shah Khadri and two Hindu litigants challenged the government order making it a Wakf property. The judgement pronounced that the shrine is revered equally by the Hindus and Muslims, and ordered the status quo to be maintained. The court also upheld the rights of Shah Khadri regarding the inheritance. “
20 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wakf accessed on Oct 15.2006
A waqf is an inalienable religious endowment in Islam, typically devoting a building or plot of land for Muslim religious or charitable purposes. The WAKF board maintains all the Islamic mosques and shrines around India.
21 Though this change of name has not been through the Government, The Hindutva forces have been successful in changing the name by blackening the direction markers on the way to Bababudangiri. The place has been popularized as the Dattapeeta by the Sangh Parivar around the country.
22One of the priests of a temple in Chikmagalur warned hindu researchers to inform the police or take a policeman with them before heading towards Bababudangiri to ensure their safety.
23One of the shopkeepers also said that Hindus can maintain their caste structures at home but they need to portray a united stand against the Muslims. He quoted examples from the Jihad of Muslims to show how the Muslims stay united. He also provided example of muslim woman abiding by the rules of purdah even if they are highly educated unlike hindu women who forget their roots

Racism in America and Rap music.

2006-10-26T19:30:00.000+05:00

Hip-Hop is a popular style of music which came into existence roughly around 1970's .Hip-Hop in the 21st century is the fastest selling genre of music. It is not only a genre of music but slowly has developed itself into a cultural movement influencing youth around the world. Hip-hop is associated with dancing, tattoos, graffiti art, fashion, slangs and various other elements.1 But is Hip-hop's popularity based on just fashion, explitive lyrics,tattoos and graffiti? This is a question that has to be explored. The popularity of Hip-Hop and Rap lies in the fact that it provides an outlet to the angst of Society's youngsters. This paper through a close reading of a few early Rap/ Hip-Hop songs tries to trace how racism is still prevalent in America in spite of the various anti-racial stance that the government adopts . The rappers through music, try to put forth the issue of racism and assert their black identity. Hip-hop that started as a Black man's movement against racism has now been assimilated by the White man to express his angst against the society, the government etc.2

The Harlem renaissance3 of the early 20th Century lead to the popularity of African-American forms of music like the Jazz and the Blues. The Jazz and Blues movement of the early 20th century was a musical expression of the syncretic African-American culture and and assertion of the African roots of the Black Americans.4 During the Mid 20th century, Rock n roll , Funk, Soul became popular and African- American artistes such as Marvin Gaye, The Mama's and Papa's, Aretha Franklin, Chuck Berry and Bo Diddley etc gained enormous success. Early 1970's saw the decline of black musicians as white listeners shifted their tastes to Country music , Rock and Heavy Metal etc. The Late 1970 's saw the emergence of Hip Hop music in the “Block Parties” Of Harlem. Till the year 1985, Hip Hop was associated more with the various dance styles it adopted, turntables, rhythms and the breaks it explored. The year 1985 saw artiste's such as Run DMC collaborating with hard-rock bands such as Aerosmith, bringing the black artiste's into focus again. The new wave of Hip-Hop raised issues of race,social equality and rights of the black community through music. It went back to the African oral tradition where in the rapper played the role of the Griot5 who presents the legends and tales. Tu Pac Shakur in his song “I wonder if heaven got a ghetto” went on to tell the tale of his childhood . “.I was raised, the little young nigga doin bad s***..Talk much s*** cause I never had s***..I could remember being whupped in class..And if I didn't pass mama whupped my a**..”6 Through the song he put forth the issues the people living in Ghetto faced .The DJ or the Rapper narrate the tales of the ghetto and the violence against them through toasting7 .Artiste's such as Public Enemy, Arrested development, Nigga With Attitude,Tu Pac Shakur, Notorious BIG voiced their distress through music and raised questions against racial discrimination, poverty and violence.8

The African-American9 has always been stereotyped by the white American as innately savage, animalistic, destructive, and criminal , deserving punishment. Till late 20th century the whites feared miscegenation .Many states passed the anti miscegenation law10 which prohibited marriage between different ethnic groups and those who trespassed the law were charged under adultery or forniction.11This fear of miscegenation is evident in 'Public Enemy's' song “The fear of the black planet “Are you afraid of the mix of Black and White..We're livin' in a land where..The law say the mixing of race..Makes the blood impure..She's a woman I'm a man..But by the look on your face..See ya can't stand it.. . 12 Public enemy also questioned the whole notion of racial purity. They argued that racial purity is a social construct and not a biological truth. What is pure? Who is pure?..Is it European state of being, I'm not sure..If the whole world was to come..Thru peace and love..Then what would we made of?....13 Public Enemy' states that the white man creates a fear of the black man “Why is this fear of Black from White..I've been wonderin' why...People livin' in fear..Of my shade..(Or my hi top fade)..I'm not the one that's runnin'..But they got me one the run..Treat me like I have a gun.. 14The Black man though innocent is constructed as the bad man. “All I got is genes and chromosomes..Consider me Black to the bone..All I want is peace and love..On this planet..(Ain't that how God planned it?)..Excuse us for the news..You might not be amused..But did you know White comes from Black..No need to be confused..Excuse us for the news..I question those accused..Why is this fear of Black from White..Influence who you choose?”15 Another group 'Niggers with Attitude ( N.W.A)' in their song “Niggaz for life” state that they would call themselves a nigger because thats the identity that has been given to them.“Nigger, this Nigger, that ...The actual fact is that I'm black...And bound to attract...The attention of another ...I mean the other....I call myself a nigger 'cause my skin won't whiten...16 N.W.A point out at the hypocrisy of the white men who want to civilize the black and also discriminate against them. He states that he need not be white in order to attract but he already is the white man's centre of attention. The rapper prefers to assert his blackness rather than escape his identity.
The Government policies failed to ensure equality in social and cultural realm. The African-American is still called a nigger even after the Emancipation Proclamation and the Thirteenth Amendment17 Tu Pac in the song “ I wonder if heaven got a ghetto” questions the Government about the rights of the black man in a “democratic” American society . “I see no changes, all I see is racist faces..Misplaced hate makes disgrace to races..We under I wonder what it take to make this ..one better place, let's erase the wait state......It takes skill to be real, time to heal each other...And though it seems heaven-sent...We ain't ready, to have a black President, huh...It ain't a secret don't conceal the fact...” 18In spite of different Government policies against racial discrimination, the the black man suffers poverty . Poverty forces them to resolve to criminal activities in order to fill their empty stomachs. ..”Is life worth living should I blast myself....I'm tired of being poor and even worse I'm black....My stomach hurts so I'm lookin for a purse to snatch....19”. Socially the black man stays at the foot of the social ladder irrespective of his educational or economical background You're a nigger 'til you die ....If you're a poor nigger, then you're a poor nigger ...If you're a rich nigger, you're a rich nigger..But you never stop being a nigger ..And if you get to be educated, you's an education nigger ...It's plain to see, you can't change me...'Cause I'm a be a nigger for Life ...”

Racial violence is another issue that rappers focus attention on. Lynching was a practice that white Americans followed to punish blacks ,by executing them in public.20 The practice of lynching, though not seen anymore in modern America, is still continuing in a new form. Police brutality and oppresion is still common in the Ghettos. “Cops give a damn about a ne-gro.....Pull a trigger kill a nigger he's a hero...Mo' nigga mo' nigga mo' niggaz....I'd rather be dead than a po' nigga...Let the Lord judge the criminals...If I die, I wonder if heaven got a ghetto...Just think, if niggaz decide to retaliate...(Soldier in the house)..I wonder if heaven got a ghetto”21. Youths are killed , and booked under false cases22. This leads to more violence and riots . Racial politics of the police leads to violent behaviour of the Black community. “Why do I call myself a nigger, you ask me?..Because police always wanna harass me..Every time that I'm rollin..They swear up and down that the car was stolen ..Make me get faced down in the street ...They throw the s*** out my car on the concrete..In front of a residence ..A million white m*****f****** on my back like I shot the President .....Nigger. Nigger. Nigger ..Nigger. Nigger ..Nigger, please..I'm treated like a f***** disease” 23The black man would rather commit a crime then be booked and killed under false accusations. Hence police violence leads to the their retaliation by involving in gang wars and drug menace. “Don't wanna be another statistic, out here doin nuttin...Tryin to maintain in this dirty game, keep it real...and I will even if it kills me, my young niggaz..24

In the essay “The Fact of blackness”Frantz Fanon25 states that a black man has to objectify himself as the white man has in order to understand his own identity.Rappers subvert the stereotypes to assert their black identity..' In one of his albums, “Loyal to the Game”, Tu Pac Shakur says a "N.I.G.G.A. is Never Ignorant About Getting Goals Accomplished"” Tu-pac subverts the derogatory term “nigger” which is often associated with laziness and immorality to present the nigga as a hardworking person who does not rest till the goal is accomplished. The Gangsta becomes the image of the black man. The Gangsta fights for black freedom and against police oppression .The gangsta appropriates the stereotype of the black man as evil , an anti social menace.”And for a youth to survive a nigga gotta be a gangster..And I'm a nigga you can't remove.”26 .....As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I take a look at my life and realize nothings left..Look at the situation, they got me facing I can never live a normal life, I was raised by the stripes So I gotta be down with the hood team..Been spending most of our lives living in the gangstas paradise .Keep spending most of our lives living in the gangstas paradise27 The rappers intentionally use profanities such as “m***** f*****” to appropriate an animal image. 28“I call myself a nigger 'cause the s*** that I'm writing ...Hypes me, hypes other m***** f***** around me..And that's the reason why they want to surround me....29 Guns, drugs and women become symbols of black masculinity.While the west coast rappers resolved to assert their gangsta image, East coast rappers dealt with social issues and put forward the thought of a united syncretic America.”United minds of the Americas..minds of Africa and the Caribbean and the Europeans and the Asians and Australians..it's not just race we're all in this together! ”30 They insisted that America can't claim a homogeneous white identity for it occupies a syncretic space wherein all ethnic groups live together.They suggest the black American to let go of all the violence and negativity and to assert their African roots “Lets play a game of jeopardy what's the question?..Social Medicines the answer..I try to eat healthy to avoid the cancer..one ounce of prevention beats 100 pounds of cure..pure ways of living is not hippish..it's not white not black it's just conscious..conscious of your health, conscious of your self..instead of being so damn conscious of your wealth..(or lack of so...).DO you know about the Panthers,..the MOVE organization, Kwame..Nkrumah, the Zulu nation or just Nikes and Pumas..or your fascination with the so-called B-Boy fashion nation...If you can please recycle..even the people in the hood please recycle..I know it wasn't our fault that they went psycho..they meaning industry exec's who flex for profit!..Traditional societies and islanders..please retain your culture and don't give up!..Don't you understand we must understand this..if we want to live in bliss..”31

Traditionally, Africans have been given the lowest social order. They have been stereotyped as animalistic, uncivilized, living in the body, impure, savage etc. In the Post-Colonial Era one expected to see changes in the attitudes of the White population in America, Though measures have been taken by the Government of United States of America to curb racism by introducing various laws , they are ineffective due to the corruption, red tapism and other such reasons .In such circumstance the black American continues to be an out-caste and suffers oppression. The history of subjugation in the name of race and colour continues. Rap and Hip-hop have become cultural movements, popular all around the world for their usage of slang, the fashion , tattoos and graffiti. They have become synonymous with African-American Culture in the past decade. The Rappers of America who are predominantly black, use music as a medium to express their angst against this oppression

1 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hip_hop_music accessed on Oct 10, 2006.
2Rap Music in the beginning was a music genre with mostly black artiste's. It is only now in the 21st century that white artiste's like Eminem , Fergie, Justin Timberlake, Britney Spears etc have adopted the rap and hip hop music forms . The popularity of Rap amongst White people could be seen as an expression of white anger against the society
Music Making History: Africa Meets Europe in the United States of the Blues. In Nikongo Ba'Nikongo, ed., Leading Issues in Afro-American Studies. Durham, North Carolina: Carolina Academic Press, 1997, pp. 189-233. Copyright © 1997, Carolina Academic Press. http://asweknowit.ca/evcult/USBlues.shtml accessed Oct 10, 2006.
“For, as relentlessly black as rap has been, since the mid-eighties its largest audience has been white, and male (Samuels, 1991, cf. Harrington, 1992, pp. 376-382). One is reminded of Gerald Early's (1989, p. 138) remark about a passage from Norman Mailer's account of the Ali-Forman bout in Zaire where Mailer "expresses a very simple and very old idea here, namely, that the black male is metaphorically the white male's unconsciousness personified." The hidden psycho-social logic of racism has operated so that the anger black rappers express on their own behalf, and against whites, matches the anger white males feel--perhaps about themselves, or their elders, or both-- but are not so willing to express. The anger which drove the rapper to create something which is, among other things, ethnically his, allows whites to feel their own anger though the rappers' performance while getting the vicarious thrill of an imaginary trip to the archetypal exotic Black Jungle Ghetto much as, half a century ago, their grandparents went to the Cotton Club to view erotic stage shows danced to hot jazz.”
3 "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harlem_Renaissance accessed on 10 Oct 2006.
“The Harlem Renaissance was a flowering of art, literature and music in the United States led primarily by the African American community based in Harlem, New York City. Most of the participants in this African American literary movement were descendants from a generation whose parents or grandparents had witnessed the injustices of slavery and the gains and losses that would come with Reconstruction after the American Civil War as the nation moved forward into the gradual entrenchment of Jim Crow in the Southern states and in its non-codified forms in many other parts of the country. Others were Africans and people of African descent from the Caribbean who had come to the United States hoping for a better life. Characterizing the Harlem Renaissance was an overt racial pride that came to be represented in the idea of the New Negro who through intellect, the production of literature, art, and music could challenge the pervading racism and stereotypes from the larger white community of that era to promote progressive or socialist politics and racial integration and social integration. The creation of art and literature would serve to “uplift” the race. This became known as racial political propaganda. There would be no set style or uniting form singularly characterizing the various forms of art coming out of the Harlem Renaissance. Rather, there would be a mix of contradictory styles embracing European standards, celebrating a Pan-Africanist perspective, “high-culture” and the “low-culture or low-life,” the traditional form of classical music to the blues and jazz, traditional and new experimental forms in literature like modernism and in poetry, for example, the new form of jazz poetry. For blacks, their art was a way to prove their humanity and demand for equality.”
4 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blues accessed on 10 Oct..2006
“An early form of blues-like music was a call-and-response shouts, which were a "functional expression... style without accompaniment or harmony and unbounded by the formality of any particular musical structure."A form of this pre-blues was heard in slave field shouts and hollers, expanded into "simple solo songs laden with emotional content".The blues, as it is now known, can be seen as a musical style based on both European harmonic structure and the West African call-and-response tradition, transformed into an interplay of voice and guitar.” Jazz is an original American musical art form originating around the start of the 20th century in New Orleans, rooted in African American musical styles blended with Western music technique and theory. Jazz uses blue notes, syncopation, swing, call and response, polyrhythms, and improvisation.”
5 http://www.answers.com/topic/griot accessed on Oct 10 2006
African tribal storyteller. The griot's role was to preserve the genealogies and oral traditions of the tribe. Griots were usually among the oldest men. In places where written language is the prerogative of the few, the place of the griot as cultural guardian is still maintained. In Senegal, for example, the griot-without resorting to fantasy-recites poems or tells stories of warriors, drawing on his own sources of inspiration
6 I wonder if heaven got a ghetto, Are you still down ( I remember). Tu Pac Shakur, Death Row Records. Nov 24, 1998
7 http://www.answers.com/topic/toasting-1 accessed on Oct 10 2006
Toasting has been part of African American urban tradition since Reconstruction as part of a verbal art tradition, dating back to the griots of Africa. African American stories usually lauds the exploits of the clever and not entirely law-abiding trickster hero (not always human) who uses his wits to defeat his opponents. Toasters continue the oral tradition by recounting the legends and myths of the community in venues ranging from street corner gatherings, bars, and community centers, to libraries and college campuses. As with oral traditions in general, and with other African American art forms as the blues, toasting uses a mixture of repetition and improvisation.
8 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Old_school_hip_hop
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Golden_age_hip_hop
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rap_music accessed on Oct 10, 2006
9 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/African_American accessed on Oct 10, 2006
An African American (also Afro-American, Black American) is a member of an ethnic group in the United States whose ancestors, usually in predominant part, were indigenous to Africa The majority of African Americans are the descendants of enslaved Africans transported via the Middle Passage from West and Central Africa to North America and the Caribbean from 1609 through 1807 during the trans-Atlantic slave trade.
10 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-miscegenation_laws accessed on Oct 10.2006
11 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miscegenation#United_States accessed on Oct 10.2006 Vermont was the only state to never introduce such legislation. These laws were not completely repealed until November 2000, when Alabama became the last state to repeal its law.
12 Fear of the black planet, Fear of the Black Planet, Public Enemy Def Jam Records July 26. 1994
13Ibid.
14Ibid.
15Ibid.
16Niggaz for life,EFIL4ZAGGIN. Niggers With Attitude. Priority Records.May 27, 1991.
17 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thirteenth_Amendment_to_the_United_States_Constitution , http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emancipation_Proclamation accessed on Oct 10, 2006
The Emancipation Proclamation was a presidential order on January 1, 1863 declaring the freedom of all slaves in those areas of the Confederate States of America that had not already returned to Union control. Amendment XIII (the Thirteenth Amendment) of the United States Constitution officially abolished slavery and, with the exception of allowing punishments for crimes, prohibits involuntary servitude.
18 Ibid.
19Ibid
20 http://www.spartacus.schoolnet.co.uk/USAlynching.htm accessed on Oct 10.2006.
21Ibid.
22 There are many cases of racial brutality by the police, registered in America. The links below provide information about a few such incidents .
http://www.wsws.org/articles/2005/oct2005/nola-o13.shtml accessed on Oct 10 2006.
http://www.wsws.org/articles/2004/feb2004/nypd-f25.shtml accessed on Oct 10 2006.
http://www.wsws.org/news/1998/oct1998/ai-o27.shtml accessed on Oct 10 2006.
http://www.newyouth.com/archives/usa/usa_today_police_brutality_20000623.asp accessed on Oct 10 2006.
23Ibid
24 Young Niggaz, Me against the world. Tu Pac Shakur. Interscope Records. March 14.1995.
25 http://www.nathanielturner.com/factofblackness.htm accessed on Oct 10.2006.
“What? While I was forgetting, forgiving, and wanting only to love, my message was flung back in my face like a slap. The white world, the only honorable one, barred me from all participation A man was expected to behave like a man. I was expected to behave like a black man—or at least like a nigger. I shouted a greeting to the world and the world slashed away my joy. I was told to stay within bounds, to go back where I belonged. They would see then! I had warned them, anyway. Slavery? It was no longer even mentioned, that unpleasant memory. My supposed inferiority? ....... I was resolved, since it was impossible for me to get away from an inborn complex, to assert myself as a BLACK MAN. Since the other hesitated to recognize me, there remained only one solution: to make myself known. “
26Nigga with a gun, The Chronic. Dr Dre . Death Row Records.Dec 15. 1992
27Gangsta's Paradise, Coolio Rhino/ADA. Nov 25. 1995
28Profanities are common to most west coast rappers who are recognized for their overt masculine image, their overtly sexual music videos and graphic lyrics.
29Ibid
30 United minds, Arrested development Greatest hits, Arrested Development. EMI Gold (UK).May 14,2001. Original year of recording not found
31Ibid.

Bath Time

2006-10-20T20:58:00.000+05:00

Happy Diwali time.. And guess who gets the oil bath. The elder Kid.. Tom

Long time no see

2006-10-17T20:40:00.000+05:00

"Long time no see" Thats what all my friends have been saying for a few weeks.. The not to be seen phenomenon is not restricted to my blog but also extended to my real life. Spent a week thinking about my paper submissions. Spent another writing them. I havent yet finished. Need to finish all of them. But yes Iam satisfied with what I wrote.

These few days have been pretty revealing. I was feeling a bit low in the beginning for I realised that there was lot of competition at college and friendships didnt matter to others . Also realised I have been too nice to a few people. It was difficult to cut those relationships and move on. But had to do so for it did effect my self esteem. So after finishing that chapter, I moved back to my life.I also quit orkut. Ha.. big deal.. I dont miss it at all.. It was sheer waste of time and I got so addicted to it that I really wanted to run away from it.

Met a really interesting friend,His name is Iyer, Arvind Iyer. Absolut Iyer as he prefers to call himself is very sweet and intelligent chap. A friend who makes me laugh. One can lean on him when one is down and trust me he will get you smiling in just a few seconds.A complete media guy. Entertains you with his great jokes (although I will laugh at all his PJs too) . Absolute fun... And all the beautiful gals guess what he is single and ready to mingle.

Got my exams coming up in a few days. So got to study hard this time. Dont want to miss all the incentives that sunshine is ready to gift me. My best friend Sunshine is back after his visit to Germany . And.... Nothing much happening otherwise.. its all nice and peaceful in Shubhs wonderland.. C ya all after my exams hopefully with something interesting to write about

DOGGY’ S DAY OUT - CUPA DOG SHOW A Canine Fund Raiser for Animals in aid of a Sanctuary for Large Animals

2006-10-07T13:49:00.000+05:00

Compassion Unlimited Plus Action - CUPA is a registered public charitable Trust for the welfare of animals based in Bangalore. From two tiny rooms in the home of its Founder President, Crystal Rogers, in October 1991, CUPA today operates from three centres. More than 10,000 wild and domestic animals pass through its portals and services range from urban stray dog control to load bearing animal relief centres, from 24 hours, 7 days a week animal shelter and emergency care center, to rehabilitation of wildlife in their indigenous forest zones.

Today, CUPA in Bangalore is synonymous with animal advocacy and welfare. There is an element of personalized care in the busy KVAFSU-CUPA Veterinary Animal Shelter at Hebbal campus that CUPA runs in the heart of Bangalore for all types of animals – stray, wounded, abused, owned or abandoned.

Due to inadequate education and large families, the owners of draught animals as per our Survey, has revealed very limited financial resources at their disposal. Hence, there is a lack of medical treatment, aid or advice on animal care. CUPA is witness to problems faced by the draught animals and farmers in remote villages who have minimal access to medical aid for their animals.CUPA’s Out-Reach Programme, at present, organises free large animal monthly health camps reaching out to hundreds of animal of farmers, bullock carts and jutka owners. However, there is a crying need of a Sanctuary for large animals to provide the abandoned, the sick and aged large animals with proper medical aid and good care.To realise CUPA’s dream for such a Sanctuary, a special fun - filled eventfor the entire family and children of all ages has been organised in November 2006 as

Doggy’s Day Out - A Special Dog Show

The event includes pedigree dogs as well as non- pedigree dogs. A memorable day out with your family , friends AND YOUR PET DOG. The date and venue of the event will be informed to you.The Dog Show will be followed by an Entertainment Programme and your family and pets’ needs will be fulfilled at the variety of stalls at the Show.To mark this occasion, we will bring out a brochure soCome.....join hands with us and sponsor an advertisement in our brochureas One who cares!

KINDLY COMPLETE THE FORM GIVEN BELOW IN BLOCK LETTERS AND RETURN TO CUPA,
257, ICROSS, HAL II STAGE,
INDIRANAGAR, BANGALORE - 560 038
TEL: 22947300/22947301
FAX: 2229377

1Name of the person/Company:
Address of Person/Company:
Tel/Mobile:
Fax:
Email:
Category of Advertisement: Please tick the relevant Category
B/W Colour
Inside FRONT cover : - Rs.20,000
Inside BACK cover : - Rs.20,000
Back cover : - Rs.25,000
Full Page : Rs.7,500 Rs.10,000
Half Page : Rs.2,500 Rs. 3,000
Quarter Page : Rs.2,500 -
Strips : Rs. 500 -
Size of Full page: 27cm X 20 cm
Last date for entry of advertisement matter is 10th October 2006.

Advertisement material:

Cheques/D.D. may kindly be made in favour of ‘ CUPA’:
Please find enclosed Cash/Cheque/D.D. No ..... dt.....for Rs........ Your valued contribution - personal/Company in the brochure are welcome
Donations to CUPA are exempt from Income Tax under section 80G of the IT Act.

Link: In Totidem Verbis

C.U.P.A Fund raiser

2006-10-04T15:22:00.000+05:00

We at CUPA ( Compassion Unlimited Plus Action) are organising a fund raising event for a large animal shelter at Kengeri on 5th november at Sulivan Police grounds, opposite Garuda Mall on Magrath road. The event starts at 11.30 am. Please Participate in the event with your cute little darlings thats your pets. There are 10 events wherein your dear darling will not pnly be tested for how disciplined he/she is but for how naughty and playful they are.( the events are:" Look like your owner", "Fattest Dog" "Most Talented","Best Smile", "Most Well Groomed"" Funniest walk","Prettiest eyes""Most Disobedient"" Best Mixed Breed""Curliest tail"). The entry fee for participation is Rs 100/-. Entrance fee for the event is Rs 20/- for people who are not bringing along their pets for people who bring in their pets the Entrance fee would be Rs 50/-We also have stalls at the event. Each stall costs 5k, For details on stalls contact nankam03@yahoo.co.in.We need around 50 Volunteers for the event, Any help will be highly valued. Do Contact CUPA for more details or email Kaushik at kaushiksv@yahoo.com or kaushik.sv.22@gmail.com

Cross-posted @ All for bow

2006-10-01T00:05:00.000+05:00

Evening
Chaos
Words
Conflict
Distance
Longing
Night falls
Silence
Missing warmth
Mind searches
Comfort
Poetry gives
Respite

To my sunshine.. Miss u dear..